


If You Call, I'll Answer

by Katealexandra



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Roommates/Housemates, Captain Swan AU Week 2016, Daddy!Killian, Explicit Sexual Content, F/F, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Mentions of past child abuse, Minor Character Death, Past Baelfire | Neal Cassidy/Emma Swan, Past Captain Hook | Killian Jones/Milah, Tags Contain Spoilers, Underage Drinking, call center au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-17
Updated: 2017-09-18
Packaged: 2018-07-24 16:15:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 25,790
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7514855
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Katealexandra/pseuds/Katealexandra
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Emma works in a call center simply to pay off her student loans and she absolutely hates it. She lives with her longtime college friend Killian who moved her in with him after a pregnant Emma was abandoned by Neal Cassidy. Almost four years later, they still live together, raising Emma’s son Henry but they are only friends. Emma is afraid to ruin their friendship but maybe it’s time to take a leap of faith and find out if loving Killian is worth the risk.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Just Another Day at Work

**Author's Note:**

> I have had this idea nagging me for a while and I waited for CS AU Week to post it.

"Thank you for calling Gold Communications. My name is Emma. How may I help-"

"YOUR FUCKING COMPANY IS CORRUPT AND AWFUL AND I HOPE YOU GO TO HELL BECAUSE YOU WORK FOR THE DEVIL!" click.

Emma doesn't even get the chance to breathe before she hears the chime that signals a new call has come in immediately following the asshole who decided 7:00 am was the perfect time to prank call the cable company.

"Good morning! Thank you for calling Gold Communications. My name is Emma. How may I help you today?"

The caller, a man responded, "What's your name? Are you located in the United States?"

"My name is Emma and yes, I am located in the United States…."

Twenty five minutes later, Emma was still listening to the same guy rant and rave about how she hadn't yet helped him fix his services, that he pays too much for such shitty service and that the automated answering system is a pain in his ass. Unfortunately every time Emma tried to speak the guy cut her off and began a new tirade on some aspect of the company but because he wasn't cursing obscenely or threatening her, she couldn't hang up. Finally the man seemed to have ranted himself to exhaustion after thirty six minutes and Emma spoke quickly and without interruption. She managed to solve his problems in under three minutes. And if the man had just shut the fuck up he wouldn't have wasted forty minutes of both of their days.

Ding.

"Good morning! Thank you for calling Gold Communications. My name is Emma. How may I help you today?"

"Emma, thank you for answering. You speak English?" A man's voice, Emma would probably guess the caller to be late fifties or early sixties.

 _Was I speaking fucking Elvish?_ Emma ignored the man's comment and asked the questions needed to bring up his account. Not surprisingly he wanted the same services he had for less than his already low rate. He did not take it well when Emma explained he had the best rate and she could do anything other then extend the duration of his discount for another two years.

"You have no idea how difficult it is for someone who has a fixed income. You don't sound like you're very old. Have you even graduated high school? I mean you're probably some dropout on food stamps. I bet you're an unwed mother with a few men's bastards running around."

Emma was seething. This person didn't even fucking know her but the unwed mom comment struck a serious cord and it took everything she had not to flip the fuck out, throw her headset down and walk the hell out. But she thought of her three year old son, Henry, who was in the onsite daycare and she knew she couldn't just quit. She was already getting help from her oldest and dearest friend Killian who had moved her (and Henry) into his six bedroom house _("I've got plenty of room to spare, Swan. Don't let me rattle around in this big, old house alone. You can stay as long as you need to."_ ) when Neal left her pregnant, alone and homeless.

"Sir, you called today to discuss your account and making unfounded personal comments about me has no bearing on this conversation," Emma relied smoothly and evenly in her well practiced customer service voice.

"So I'm right. Your generation is just so irresponsible it's not even funny," the man laughed dryly.

"All due respect, sir," Emma began ( _in other words, fuck you asshole_ ), "you are incorrect in your assumptions. I completed high school and college and only took this job to help my husband and I pay a $900 per month student loan bill. My annual income goes almost entirely towards student loans and what little that is left I spend on my son. So I have some idea how difficult things can be when you have a limited income and a lot of bills."

Technically she had distorted the truth a little bit but most of what she said was true. Killian's family had lots of money and he didn't have student loans like she did. He was given a house for his graduation present (his parent's will had stipulated that if he finished university he would be given one of the family's houses and control over his trust fund) and so Killian didn't charge her rent or for any expenses for the house. Hell, he covered almost everything for her. She tried once to protest and he had insisted. Killian's family money bought and paid for the upkeep on house. He had a guaranteed job with his family's law firm before she had even met him. ( _"Friends take care of each other, Swan. I can and will as long as you'll let me."_ )

And Emma didn't fight him about it because he was the first person in her life who stayed, who took care of her no matter what. Thanks to Killian, she was so close to paying them off for good, only three more payments until she was debt free. She had lived with Killian for almost four years now. He helped her with Henry and even though she had tried to explain to Henry many times, he often called Killian "Daddy". Not that she could blame her son, because to Henry, Killian was daddy; he read him stories, played with him and was always there. They were an odd little family but she and Killian had never taken that next step. And it wasn't for lack of attraction. God knew they had always been attracted to each other. Why weren't they together?

Because Emma didn't want to ruin their relationship.

Emma brought her brain back from its inappropriately timed tangent and focused. Thankfully she was met with absolute fucking silence for a good thirty seconds. Emma wanted to say so much more than she had already but she'd be walking the line of well phrased retort and rudeness if she pushed it further.

"Now, sir, did you have any other questions about your account that we can address today?"

She wrapped up the call without further difficulties and logged out for her break.

In the break room, she ran into Aurora, the top agent in the call center and her good friend. They both had sons the same age. Aurora was the exact opposite of Emma, sweetness and charm oozed from her naturally. Emma had always been told she was a bit prickly.

"Hey Aurora, how's it going?" Emma asked taking a seat on the couch.

"Same old. People have been nuts this morning," Aurora sighed, sipping her coffee.

They shared a few stories of crazy shit people had said to them, when Emma's phone went off.

**My case was resolved faster than expected. Is it okay if I pick Henry up from daycare and have a day at the park? - K.**

Emma smiled.

"Is that Killian?"

"Yeah, um.. How'd you know?"

"Really Emma, I've known you a long time. Only two things make you light up like that. Henry and Killian," Aurora smirked.

Emma blushed.

"Seriously Emma, you love him, he loves you. You guys are already great together. I mean I thought you guys were a couple when I first met him."

Aurora got up and went back to her desk and Emma realized her break was almost over so she sent a quick text to Killian.

**Yeah. Great minds. I'm leaving at noon. Got to use my vacation or lose it. So why don't you come get us since we took the train this morning. - E.**

Emma's calls went much better leading up to her lunch time when she had scheduled to leave. About forty minutes before the end of her day, she got a call from a sweet elderly lady named Sara. Sara called 4 times a month with just general questions, according to the notes on her account. After ten minutes of talking to Sara, Emma learned why. Sara's husband of fifty-six years had passed away six months ago and the woman was lonely. She saw her kids six times a year and instead of visiting her for her 85th birthday, they sent her an iPad that she had no idea how to use.

Emma felt her heart break for the woman. It was the worst thing in the world not to have anyone. Well today, she would be Sara's someone. Emma patiently walked Sara through the setup of the iPad and getting it connected to her wifi. She helped her download the company's streaming app and helped her login. After they had completed that, Emma asked Sara what kinds of television shows and movies she like to watch. Sara, happy to have someone to talk to, explained that she loved romantic shows and historical programs. Emma gave several recommendations but saved her favorite for last.

"Sara, there is a show I know you'll love. It's called Outlander and it's on Starz," Emma explained.

"What's it about?" Sara asked.

As Emma explained the premise of the show, she could tell Sara was intrigued by the love story of Claire and Jamie. Emma helped her access the prior season via the app so she could get caught up and prepared for the new season that was about to begin. Eventually she started to wrap up the call.

"Is there anything else I can help you with today?"

"No, thank you. You've been so wonderful. I appreciate your help so much. You're such a sweet girl. You have a great day, honey!"

Emma bid Sara goodbye and logged out for the day. Grabbing her purse and keys, she went down the steps to the daycare and picked up Henry. Henry was so excited to see her and as they walked out of the building, she found Killian leaning against his black BMW in his suit and a pair of sunglasses. Henry begged to be let down and ran to Killian who picked him up and swung him around. Killian greeted her with a quick kiss on the cheek.

"We should stop at home and change. Maybe grab a few things and head to the beach house for the weekend. It's been ages since we've spent time with Liam, Elsa and the kids and I know you could use some time away from this place," he gestured to the building behind them. "We could also invite Mary Margaret, David, Ruby, Dorothy, Robin, Regina and Will and Belle. Just have an impromptu house party this weekend. Just like old times," Killian winked, laughing as she rolled her eyes.

"Except everyone would have their children with them and I doubt the alcohol consumption would be anywhere near what it was in college. But it sounds lovely. Let's go. You drive and I'll email everyone that we are having a house party this weekend," Emma smiled.

Killian had always said she was an open book to him and he always knew exactly what she needed. She had had a horrible day and now was actually looking forward to her weekend with her boys and all of her closest friends. As they made their way home, she watched him from the passenger seat and thought about her earlier musings and what Aurora had said. Killian caught her watching him and smiled from ear to ear. Oh, this weekend was going to be interesting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story was nominated on Tumblr for the Captain Swan Fanfic Awards in the following categories:
> 
> Best Alternate Universe (Modern Setting) WIP
> 
> Best Plot WIP
> 
> Best WIP -50k
> 
> I am beyond humbled to be considered in these categories along with so many other talented folks. I'm Katealexandra26 on Tumblr if you want to find me over there.


	2. Meet Cute

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> All love stories have a beginning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It has taken me a long time to update and for that I'm sorry. This idea is one I have spent months working on. I have a clear idea now what I want from this story and for that I needed to show you things from Emma and Killian’s past. This chapter will be a moment from their past and then it will alternate from past back to the present where we left off. We should be back to the future with another update Saturday 
> 
> Disclaimer: I am not from nor have I ever been to Boston, Massachusetts. All of the info I have put into this has come from meticulous Google searches.

**August 2006**

Killian was furious. He had never been late in his life. Punctuality was always expected in the Jones household. Well - in accordance with his father's schedule, anyways. Brennan Jones might have been an absentee parent he had always expected children to be seen, not heard and punctual with no excuses for lateness. According to his brother, Liam, their father wasn't always like that, Brennan just hadn't been the same since their mother died bringing Killian into this world. His father was more than satisfied with seven year old Liam, and wasn't overjoyed with the addition especially since the doctors had warned Diane against further attempts to get pregnant after a series miscarriages. Though according to his brother and stepmother, his mother called Killian her “little miracle”. Diane Jones expressed many times during her labor that she would prefer, if it came down to it, the doctors would save her child first and ultimately they heeded her request. Brennan couldn't hold Killian when he had been born and in almost nineteen years that hadn't changed.

Growing up, Killian always had to bear his father’s resentment toward him for the loss of the love of his life. From the time he was born his father entrusted his care to his mother’s friend Ingrid. Brennan and Ingrid married when Killian was two as part of a practical agreement for the children. Somehow, over time, they came to have a real and deep affection for each other which Killian could never understand. He had a lovely childhood in the care of his stepmother until he was twelve and his father sent him to boarding school, despite all protests. His father suddenly gained an interest in Killian the past few months and Brennan seemed convinced he needed to have more input in his younger son's life. The most recent subject being Killian's future.

Killian had been telling his father for years that he wanted to be a musician rather than attend university but his father insisted that per the terms of Killian's trust fund, he had to attend college to gain access to the funds at twenty-five. If he didn't then he would have to wait until he was thirty-five to have control over his money. Today's argument ended in Brennan giving Killian early access to his trust and the deed to one of his father's homes in Brookline’s Cottage Farm area (which was convenient due to its close proximity to the university and he was already set to live there in the interim) upon the completion of his undergraduate studies if he then enrolled in law school and joined the family law practice after passing the bar.

Killian only agreed because his father hadn't stipulated the length of time he would have to work at the law firm. It was a loophole, if you will, in his father's attempts to control Killian's life. The lure of doing whatever the hell he wanted once he completed his education, gained control of his trust and had his own home was too much temptation to resist. Killian Jones was a patient man and to gain his freedom, to end all the damn fighting, seven years of school seemed like a small price for the rest of his life.

So of course his father was the reason he was late for his first class. His father's secretary, Nina, had held him up with all sort of paperwork that had to be completed to document the change to the terms of his trust and apparently his father's will. Killian finally approached the lecture hall which he could see looking through the window on the door was pretty damn full already. He was going to have a hell of a time sneaking in unnoticed. He opened the door quietly and entered the hall. About halfway down the steps he saw an empty seat next to a beautiful blonde. He silently proceeded to the seat and attempted to sit down, glad the professor’s back was to him. The girl had her purse on the free chair and he couldn't just sit without speaking to anyone.

“Is this seat taken?” he whispered

“No, sorry. Let me move my bag. My name is Emma, Emma Swan,” she whispered as she shuffled her computer to writing platform in front of her seat and dropped the bag at her feet.

“Killian Jones, a pleasure to meet you Emma,” Killian replied a little too loudly, taking the seat.

“Thank you for joining us, Mr. Jones,” the professor called, back still to him. “Since you couldn't join us for the start of the lecture, can you please recap the first reading assignment.”

Killian panicked and realized he hadn't done the reading assignment and was totally blindsided. Emma met his eyes then pushed the laptop down the table in front of him. It was open to a document that read “Intro to Psych: Chapter 1 Assignment” and had a well organized outline of the first chapter, key vocabulary and chapter review questions. She nodded towards the screen with a half smile and pointed to the summary she had come up with. He paraphrased her writing back to the professor and the rest of the class. The professor seemed pleased and moved on with the lecture.

Killian breathed a sigh of relief. He looked over at Emma who was diligently typing notes throughout the rest of the lecture. She occasionally glanced his way before looking back to her computer. After the lecture, students began filing out quickly trying to get to their next class. Emma didn't seem to be rushed and was packing her computer into her bag.

“Thank you for saving my sorry arse earlier. Please let me buy you breakfast or just a coffee before your next class as a thank you,” Killian asked, hopeful she would say yes.

Emma hesitated for a moment, eyes unsure if she should trust him.

“Try something new, darling, it's called trust. I am not some pervert. I just want to buy my savior a cup of coffee.” Killian watched as her eyes softened for a moment. She had a kind heart (otherwise she would've let him embarrass himself earlier) but she seemed to have walls a mile high. It made him wonder what caused their construction.

“Sure, I could use some food and coffee and I don't have another class until this afternoon,” Emma smiled.

Killian stood aside and gestured with his hand. “Neither do I. Ladies first.”

“Such a gentleman,” Emma laughed.

“I’m always a gentleman, love. Just the way I was raised. My mum would have my head if I didn’t treat a woman with the respect she deserved,” Killian said quietly. Ingrid Fisher Jones wasn’t the woman who birthed him, but she was the one who had raised and loved him. And she would most certainly be displeased if Killian was disrespectful to others.

A sad look flashed over Emma’s face before she hid it with a smile and walked past him. They walked out of the academic building and walked a short distance to a Starbucks on the other side of Commonwealth Avenue. Killian pulled the door open for Emma and she walked inside immediately heading towards the counter.

The coffee shop wasn't very busy at this hour but some students sat with laptops at a few of the tables engrossed in their work. Killian ordered a latte and a pastry before he turned towards Emma. “What would you like?” He gestured his hand at the menu board.

Emma smiled at the barista. “I would love a venti hot cocoa, whole milk, extra whipped cream and a dash of cinnamon. Name is Emma. I'd also like a cinnamon bun please.”

“Sure thing, it will be just a moment,” the barista replied.

“I take it you order that a lot,” Killian noted. Emma nodded. “Good to know.” He handed the barista the money for their order and he stood waiting for their pastries while Emma sat down a one of the tables. Killian joined her after a moment, setting his own rucksack on the floor next to his chair and handing her the cinnamon bun she ordered. They sat in a comfortable silence until Killian saw the barista approaching the pickup area with their drinks so he excused himself and went to retrieve their drinks.

“Latte for Killian and hot chocolate for Emma,” the barista shouted as he approached the counter.

“Thanks!” Killian sat back down and slid Emma's drink across the table.

“So what is your course of study?” Killian thought it would be a safe line of inquiry. Emma's smile before she began answering confirmed that he had been correct.

“I'm in the accelerated medical degree program. My undergraduate degree will be in psychology but I will complete all of the required courses for pre-med. I got a grant that covers all of my tuition and student loans to cover the rest of my costs like university housing, books and day to day living.”

“Why medicine? What made you choose it?” Killian was genuinely curious.

“My high school science teacher, Mrs. Sheppard. She encouraged me to find what felt right, told me I could be whatever I wanted as long as I was willing to fight for it. I've seen a lot of people struggle with mental illnesses and helping people find answers through medicine was what felt right to me. So I worked extremely hard to get into the medical program here at BU. How about you?”

“I am currently undeclared but I will be changing that tomorrow. I'm going into the pre-law program. I made an agreement with my father that I would study law and join the family firm.” Killian wanted to elaborate on that but didn't because it wouldn't do to scare Emma off with his family drama. He choose small talk and instead they simply chatted about little things: favorite foods, music they listened to, books they could read over and over again and movies that inspired them. He wasn't surprised to find they had a lot in common.

Killian wondered what it was that made him feel so comfortable with Emma that he so readily wanted to tell her his life's story, even though he had not delved too deep in the last - how long had it really been anyway? with a quick glance at his watch, he realized it had been a couple of hours they had just sat and talked. There was something about her that made him trust her and her passion for her chosen profession was very admirable. She was going to be an amazing doctor someday.

* * *

Emma couldn't believe how open she felt she could be with this handsome stranger, though he was less stranger to her now than he had been a few hours ago. She had promised Ruby that she would make new friends. The sexy blue-eyed Brit in front of her probably wasn't what Ruby had in mind. Well then again, he just might have been knowing Ruby. ( _You need make friends. And you definitely need to get laid, Emma. You can't let your past keep you from moving forward. Not everyone means to hurt you._ ) She met Ruby when they had started high school and Emma got a job at the diner which Ruby’s grandmother owned.

Now Ruby and Granny were her family. Ruby's mom, Anita (who had Ruby at age sixteen), had left Ruby when she was five years old and Granny had adopted her. Granny adopted Emma when she was fifteen to get her out of a horrible foster home situation. That had been almost three years ago, but fifteen years of shitty foster homes, abuse and trusting no one but herself had taken a toll. Ruby told her college would be a good place to lower her walls a bit and make a friend or two. Maybe she should give trust a try as Killian had suggested.

“Would you like to meet up tomorrow to make sure we are prepared for Wednesday’s lecture?” Emma asked, taking a baby step. It'd be good to have a study group she reasoned. She wasn't trying to get his number or anything. _No._ She absolutely wasn't.

Killian smiled brightly. “Sure I'm done class around three o'clock. May I?” he pointed to her phone. She handed it to him. Killian put his number into her phone and his phone vibrated on the surface of the table. Handing the phone back, “There you are, both my phone number and email. I'll text you after my classes and we can find a place to meet up.”

“Thanks,” Emma said, sipping her drink.

Killian's phone buzzed again, he frowned as he checked the message. “Um, I've got to go. My mates and I are finishing up moving into my new place today and one of them lost the bloody key in less than twenty-four hours.”

“Wow! And here I thought I misplaced my stuff a lot. That must be some kind of record.”

“I'm going to be living with my friends from boarding school: David, Robin and Will. I would've bet Will would be first to lose the key first but Dave, the responsible one, beat him to it.” Killian shrugged as he stood to leave.

“Well I look forward to hearing from you.” Emma really hoped he would text her.

Later that day after her classes were over and Emma arrived back at her and Ruby's apartment, she found Ruby at their kitchen table laughing with a pretty brunette sporting a pixie-style haircut.

“Hey Em, this is Mary Margaret. She's in my English class. And also apparently in your Intro to Psych,” Ruby beamed.

Emma shook Mary Margaret's hand. “Nice to meet you.”

“You were the one sitting next to Killian Jones, the tall, dark and handsome guy who arrived late. Bet he didn't realize Dr. Hopper did a roll call for the whole lecture hall and he was the only one not there,” Mary Margaret mused.

“No. I saw the panic on his face when Dr.Hopper singled him out to review the assignment. He hadn't realized Dr. Hopper emailed the class last week,” Emma confirmed.

“Well, I'd never be unprepared for his lectures if I knew he was going to single out some poor soul,” Mary Margaret admitted.

An idea struck Emma then. “Killian and I are going to study together for this class, maybe you can join us…”

“And be your buffer?” Mary Margaret finished.

“Emma, you don't need any barrier between you and a ridiculously hot guy except a condom!”

“RUBY!” Emma wanted to crawl under a rock. Her sister was the most embarrassing at times.

Mary Margaret was staring intently into the bottom of her drink, avoiding eye contact with both of them, clearly embarrassed by Ruby’s open talk.

“I'm sorry, Mary Margaret. Ruby is very open about her sexuality and likes to talk openly about sex but sometimes she forgets not everyone feels the same,” Emma offered by way of apology.

Mary Margaret brushed it off and they spent the evening just hanging out getting to know one another. Emma realized Ruby had been right about college being a good place to make friends. First Killian and then Mary Margaret. The first day of college had gone better than she expected, though she wouldn't tell Ruby that - she didn't need to hear Ruby’s smug _I told you so._ They all talked well into the evening on a variety of topics. Mary Margaret felt like her long lost sister and, for all Emma knew of her own biological family, it was entirely possible.

She had given up on having a family and trustworthy friends many years before Granny adopted her. She wasn't as open and trusting with her adopted family as she could be. College was a time of self discovery and growth, maybe it was time to embrace that, have faith and trust that not everyone meant to hurt her and give them a chance. _No, to give herself a chance!_ A chance at the one thing every orphan wanted: a real family.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title definition: A meet cute is a fictional scene, typically in film or television, in which a future romantic couple meets for the first time in a way that is considered adorable, entertaining, or amusing


	3. Getting to Know You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> College is a great place to learn all sorts of things.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I didn't update on the 19th like I said. I'm a bit of a klutz and fell off a ladder putting up Christmas decorations. Bruised some ribs and knocked my head pretty good. Lesson: don't use a ladder unattended. 
> 
> Also I said we'd be back to the future in the next chapter and I lied. I have 2-3 Chapters set in 2006 before we rejoin 2016 Killian and Emma

**August 2006**

The next afternoon when she met up with Killian at the student union building, she immediately registered the disappointment in his eyes when he noticed Mary Margaret. But Killian didn't complain, in fact he indicated he would love their study group to become a regular Tuesday night occurrence.

They went through three chapters worth of questions just to be prepared for the next three classes. Dr. Hopper had indicated he would do a chapter every class and expected it to be read and chapter question responses typed in case he decided to collect them. Students would have an hour after class to email them or drop them in his mailbox to get credit. They would have three research papers at some point and Killian admitted he was looking forward to them. Mary Margaret and Emma just gaped at him.

“Seriously?” Emma asked.

“I happen to be surprisingly good at research. I would never have shown up unprepared for his lecture on a normal day because what you get out of a class depends on how much you are willing to put into it. The only reason I was unprepared that first day was because I was caught up in an argument with my father. I have always worked hard in school and was, in fact, valedictorian of my class, not that my father noticed.” Emma noted the traces of bitterness in tone.

Mary Margaret sighed. “Parents can be a huge pain in the ass. My stepmother is just a witch. My older step-sister Zelena wanted to get away from her so much she moved 3,000 miles away. She simply dropped out of college after a year and moved to California to pursue acting. Since then my stepmother has been all over my other step-sister Regina to be her perfectly molded child, on course to be elected president some day. Which is exactly the opposite of what Regina wants. She said she didn't bother with me because I'm and I quote ‘hopeless anyway’. So I understand.”

Emma sat in utter silence, holding her breath. She was absolutely terrified they would ask her about her own parents because that wasn't information she wanted her new friends to know. She didn't want their friendship to be based on pity. And given that her parents had abandoned her as a newborn on the side of the road, how could they do anything other than pity her? Her first adoptive family sent her back when they had their own biological child. The series of foster parents after that had ranged from incompetent to outright abusive.

Granny had saved her life by adopting her. Emma was one hundred percent certain that she would be dead or in prison if not for Sarah Lucas. And well Ruby too. Here she was, a student in a medical program at a great university with everything ahead of her. It pissed her off that a casual mentioning of parents or family was all it took to bring her back to the pain and suffering of her youth. Everyday felt like a fight between the battered, abused and depressed girl she was and the confident, success woman she wanted to be. The most uncomfortable part of it all was that her insecurities felt like they were visible to the whole world.

Maybe not the whole world. Maybe just Killian Jones.

* * *

Killian saw the panic in Emma's eyes and how she was shifting in her seat like she wanted to jump out of her own skin and run and he knew Mary Margaret was a step away from asking Emma a question she was clearly not comfortable answering. Not yet. So a distraction tactic would need to be employed.

“Mary Margaret, I should introduce you to my best mate David. You and he have a lot in common, and not just in the awful step parent department. I think you guys would hit it off,” Killian interjected.

Mary Margaret mumbled something which sounded like not interested in dating.

“Well, you guys could come to the party at my house the second weekend in September. The guys wanted a party sooner but we literally just moved and I refuse to allow my house to be seen by anyone in its current chaotic state of existence. It's sort of a halfway point between David's birthday which was August 13th and Will’s on the 20th of September, so we're just making it a joint birthday party. So we are starting that Friday night and will probably wrap up sometime in the early hours Monday unless the cops show up before that. You can invite your sister or any friends you want to hang out with. Just make sure to tell them not to drink the jungle juice. Whatever Will puts in that has knocked me on my ass a time or two and I have a pretty good alcohol tolerance. Other freshman, those who haven't had alcohol before, would be doomed.”

Mary Margaret laughed and Emma's expression softened a little as she cracked a half smile.

“I think Ruby would kill me if I turned down an invitation to our first college party,” Emma joked, pausing for a moment, her facial expression suddenly more serious, “I just apologize in advance for her behavior. She can be a bit… wild.”

“I doubt she's the worst drunk I'll have to deal with and if that's price of getting you to come to the party, I'll gladly pay it,” Killian smirked.

Killian watched Emma's retort die on her tongue, as she closed her mouth and turned back to her laptop.

Checking her watch, Mary Margaret sighed. "Hey, guys, I've got to head home. My father is home from New York and we are having a family dinner tonight. I said I'd be home before 6 o'clock so could see him for a few hours. I will see you in class tomorrow. And, Killian, I'm definitely looking forward to that party. And maybe I wouldn't mind meeting your friend David.” Mary Margaret blushed, rushing to grab her bags and headed out the door without looking back.

Emma's phone buzzed loudly and she excused herself for a moment. She came back to the table a few minutes later, sitting down with a huff.

“So what are your plans for the evening? Need a ride home?” Killian inquired.

“I was going to go home and eat, but Ruby called to ask if I could make myself scarce for the rest of the night. Or at least until midnight,” Emma responded, her annoyance clear, “I’m kinda glad she called so I didn't get all the way home just to walk in on things I’d rather not see…”

“Hey, since you can't go home and probably don't have anywhere to hang out but here on campus, why don't you let me take you to a really great place for dinner.”

“Sure. I'd like that,” Emma acquiesced.

Killian and Emma walked down the street to where he had parked his car. Killian couldn't resist opening the door for Emma before getting into the car himself. After less than ten minutes, they arrived at their destination.

“Tony's?” Emma asked, taking in the sign above the door and the outdated, yet inviting decor visible through the large glass window facade of the restaurant. He could tell she had never been here before and she was probably skeptical about the quality of the place from its appearance

“It's one of my family's favorite places to eat. No matter what family drama or bullshit we have going on, good food always helps, resolve the drama if you will,” Killian shrugged. He didn't explain that this applied to everyone but himself and his father. There wasn't much that could fix their broken relationship.

“Well I won't object to a good meal,” Emma insisted.

They entered the restaurant and were immediately shown to a table. Killian gave her his family's recommendations and she listened attentively as he told her of his brother and sisters. He knew she was staring at him as he explained that Anna and Elsa were actually his step-cousins-in-law but tragic circumstances left their aunt, his stepmother, with guardianship when they were young. Anna was almost six and Elsa was twelve when their parents died. Killian was six months older than Anna but they had been in the same grade growing up. Elsa was only a year younger than Liam and they had actually fallen in love rather than bond as siblings. Their wedding would be next year and no one deserved happiness more than those two. He talked a little of his stepmother but he specifically avoided speaking about his father and Emma didn't ask. She listened well, asking questions about his stories that showed she was paying attention. Killian knew his family wasn't traditional and he thought from Emma’s reaction earlier hers hadn't been either. She seemed to relax the more he told her about himself as a young child and his own complex family situation. As they finished up their dinner, he told her one of his favorite family memories here at Tony's.

He had just turned seven the first time Ingrid had dragged them all out to dinner trying to get everyone to bond as a family unit and it hadn't been a popular opinion among the Jones and Arendelle clans. Six year old Anna had thrown her dinner at Ingrid and Brennan in one of her tantrums and as their table was in the middle of the restaurant, everyone turned their attention to the spectacle of the misbehaving child. The tension last several minutes before another patron shouted “FOOD FIGHT!” and began an incident that should have resulted in them being banned for life but turned into a massive restaurant wide food fight that made local news and the free publicity was enough that Tony and his wife adapted it into an annual food drive event that provided generous donations of both food and funds to the local communities. And the Jones and Arendelle clan bonded as a family that day, grief from loss set aside, laughter and teamwork during the food fight had helped build something. So they kept coming back to the place the held many fond family memories and milestones. Emma laughed heartily at the recounting of the tale and commended the positive outcome both for his family and the restaurant.

After enjoying dessert, Killian drove them back toward campus. Still unable to return to her apartment, Killian suggested they go to the library to work on whatever assignments they had for other courses. They found a table, set up their laptops and worked in a companionable silence, tucked away in the library undisturbed for a few hours. Until Emma kicked his foot under the table to get his attention.

“Hey, Killian. Can you take me home now? It's almost midnight.”

“Sure. What's with midnight? Are you going to turn back into a pumpkin, Cinderella?” Killian joked.

Emma snorted. “No. But Ruby and I set some ground rules from when we used to share a bedroom in Granny's apartment above the diner. If you're going to bring someone home, they have to be out before midnight. At midnight, we had to be our beds because Granny would come up from the diner to make sure we were home safe and asleep alone. She used to say we needed to be like Cinderella and be home by midnight otherwise there'd be hell to pay. Granny was loving and kind but strict about following the rules. So the pumpkin rule was born and we carried it over to our own place.”

It only took a few minutes to get to his car and drive the short distance to the address she gave. He parked and walked inside with her to her apartment door. Emma had seemed very light and open during dinner, laughing and sharing bits about herself but the interaction from earlier lingered and he could tell her walls were still there, firmly in place. From the darkness in her eyes when he talked about family, he knew that was one of the reasons she was so guarded with the deeper parts of who she was. Killian was hopeful she'd let him behind those walls someday.

Emma smiled, the brightness reaching her emerald eyes and Killian lost focus. Suddenly she was laughing, apparently at his lack of a response to whatever she said, before his brain function failed him again, he offered his apologies and bid her a good night.

“I'll see you in class tomorrow. Good night, Killian,” Emma mumbled, pushing the door closed. Killian couldn't help the smile his whole drive home.


	4. Heavy Thinking or Hard Drinking

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time to celebrate Will and David's birthdays.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this chapter is a behemoth at more than 4600 words, much longer than my normal chapters. Everytime I tried to edit I added more, so I'm sorry if there's poor editing. Also I couldn't split it down just because I felt it was important to know everything here before we head back to 2016's Emma and Killian. I'm going to try to update this twice before Christmas if I can. Enjoy!

**_September 2006_ **

Over the next few weeks they spent more time together, texting or instant messaging each other throughout the day and even at odd hours just to share bits of their days. She even met Will and his girlfriend Belle in passing one of the times she had met up with Killian in the library. David and Robin joined her, Ruby, Mary Margaret and Killian for dinner at Granny's two weeks into the school term and Emma's circle of friends steadily grew as the days flew by. The weekend of the party arrived only to find Emma and Killian in the student union wrapping up one last assignment before their party weekend started.

"I'm glad Mary Margaret sent us her part already and I've done a lot to make this a cohesive paper, but are we done yet? I want to email Dr. Hopper and go home. I'd like a nap before the madness begins," Emma whined, dropping her head to the table.

"I have to format and proofread it but I'm pretty confident we are done. I'm glad this paper was a group assignment. Made our lives easier for sure. Swan, why don't you go home and sleep. I'm sure Ruby will have you up earlier than you want to to get ready. Maybe you guys should just bring a bag and crash in one of the spare rooms. There are two other bedrooms plus the den and basement have couches with a pull out bed. Plenty of space to crash all weekend," Killian recommended.

"That's probably for the best. Are you sure?"

"I've got this. Go home. I'll see you at nine. And it's no big deal if you guys crash over," Killian confirmed.

With that, she shoved her stuff into her bag and was out the door in under five minutes. When she got home, Ruby was in the shower so Emma just went to her room and crashed on her bed without even bothering to take her shoes off.

"Emma, come on!" Ruby was practically shouting and shaking her. "Don't make me dump a bucket of water on you."

Emma threw her hands in the air and swung her legs off the side of the bed. "I'm up, I'm up. And I can shower myself so please don't dump water anywhere."

Emma jumped into action moving quickly around their tiny apartment, setting a personal record for how quickly she showered and blow dried her hair. She was helped along by the fact that Ruby had used up all of the hot water and that she was excited for the night ahead.

Ruby came into her room and sat on her bed as Emma was looking through her closet.

"I'm packed and all set to go. I can't believe Killian is letting us stay at his house. This should be fun. Oh, I got something for you," Ruby beamed. She pulled a silver box out of her bag and flashed it at Emma.

"I think you're going to need this for a weekend with a certain blue-eyed gentleman," Ruby handed her the box. Emma rolled her eyes at the implication but one glance at Ruby and the glee was apparent on her face. Emma understood Ruby wanted her to be happy but Ruby meddled more than Emma was ever going to be comfortable with.

"Rubes, I think you're going to need those more than me," Emma corrected, throwing the box back at her, Ruby's quick reflexes coming alive to catch it. Ruby tucked the box into Emma's bag.

"I have my own," she grinned flashing a second box of condoms. "You can't tell me that you don't want to jump his bones. I can tell you're attracted to him. You've thought about it, haven't you?"

"Yes, alright. I have thought about it. He's very attractive and I've thought about it a bunch of times. But we're just friends. I've never had real friends and you're my sister so you don't count 'cause you have to love me," Emma jested. "He's quickly becoming my best friend. I value that more. A guy and girl can just be friends. Right?" Emma just wanted reassurance that she was making the right choice. That being friends was all she needed.

"I think it depends. If it's what you both want, then yes, it could work. If there's something unrequited on one side, it may not work out so well and someone might get hurt," Ruby postulated. "But maybe we should save the heavy thinking and just do some hard drinking and see how things stand on Monday?"

Emma decided she could live with that. She and Ruby grabbed their bags and set off to Killian's house. It was a relatively short walk from their apartment.

They arrived early. No one else appeared to have arrived aside from Belle and a white Mercedes parked out front that Emma knew didn't belong to any of Killian's roommates, all of whom parked behind the house or in the 3 car garage according to Killian's text earlier. Emma pushed the front gate open and walked up towards the door.

Emma was floored by how beautiful his home was. One glance at her sister showed she was just as floored by the grandeur of the house. "Wow, Emma. You never said that Killian was loaded. This place is amazing."

"I had some idea, given what he's told me about his childhood and some of the places he's travelled. He hasn't really gotten into the details too much, but Killian isn't my friend because he's rich or has a cool house, Rubes."

"Right, I know. But still, damn! If you don't want him, I'll take him."

Emma knew she was glaring at that point because Ruby held up her hands in surrender. "Fuck, Em, I was just joking. Chill. He's all yours. Besides I have a friend meeting me here this weekend. We hooked up last week and she has a friend she wanted to introduce me to. I really like her and I think I might be getting a threesome at some point this weekend."

Emma rolled her eyes and knocked on the door. She was glad when Killian answered. "Hey Swan. Ruby. Come in." He stepped aside and gestured for them to enter.

"So let me take you guys to your rooms and then I'll show you where to find the booze. Just a few warnings though. Don't play poker against Will, he'll clean out your accounts. If you can get Robin on your team for darts or beer pong, do it because he has really amazing aim. David is having a bad time because his step-dad found out David had dumped his girlfriend Kathryn right after graduation as she was pining for Freddie Greyson. She admitted that she had initially been forced by her parents at least, to date David; it was more an arrangement set up by Kathryn's father and David's stepfather who are business partners. David's step-dad blew a gasket when he found out yesterday. To top it all off James refused to attend this party. James is David's twin but he goes to MIT and he and Dave don't really talk much these days. As opposite as identical twins can be. So it's all kinds of fucked up and as this is partially his birthday party, we need to make sure he has a drink at all times. I want to make sure this isn't ruined for him. I've already recruited Mary Margaret to help make sure he doesn't die from alcohol poisoning. I had Robin take Mary Margaret's sister to help with drinks so I could get Mary Margaret free to spend time with Dave."

Emma was surprised that Killian was actually going through with setting up their friends. "Oh, well aren't you Mr. Matchmaker?" Emma laughed. "But I can't believe you stuck Robin with Regina. From what Mary Margaret said, she's still getting over her mother forcing her to break up with her longtime boyfriend, Daniel. Ruby and I have gone over to Mary Margaret's house to hang out a few times and my first impressions weren't good. She's taking her mother's decision out on everyone by being rude. No, no ... it was more than rudeness; she was just an epic bitch. I almost punched her for a few things she said to Ruby and I, but didn't for Mary Margaret's sake."

"Swan, it's not nice to be so harsh on her. She's just heartbroken." Emma frowned at Killian's admonishment. "Anyways, she mentioned how much she loved horses - although that was part of a snide comment about preferring horses to humans - so I thought that as Robin's family breeds and races horses, they might have something to talk about."

"Killian, now you're just proving my point about being Mr. Matchmaker. I hope for Robin's sake Regina is a little nicer than she was to me," Emma retorted, as Killian lead them up a flight of stairs, down a hallway past several doors before he stopped. Ruby was oddly silent the whole time they had made their way through the house, watching Emma and Killian with sharp eyes. Emma knew that was never a good sign; a quiet Ruby was up to something.

"Ruby, this one is yours. Each bedroom has its own en-suite bathroom. I think you'll love the decor in there, lots of red. If not, I blame my late grandmother's interior designer."

"Oh, really?" Ruby's eyebrow shot up. "Isn't this your house? Haven't you made any changes?"

"Technically it's not mine, no, not until I graduate and enroll in law school. At which time the deed shall be presented to me. I love this house; it has a rich and illustrious history. It's been in my family for quite some time. The only big changes before we moved in were putting cable and internet into the whole place and renovating the kitchen. The guys made some minor changes to their rooms, like paint and furniture. It was important to maintain the overall character of the house but make it ours," Killian smiled, pride overflowing. Emma assumed that his quick notes version of the story would no doubt be expanded upon at some point, as she had yet to hear of his family beyond his siblings and stepmother.

"I thought your family was from across the pond?" Ruby asked, striking a look of faux innocence at her lack of knowledge. She was definitely making full use of her natural talent for rooting out the details people didn't want to share. It was one of her best and worst qualities; Emma knew from very personal experience. If Ruby wanted to know something, she'd usually find out.

"I was born in London but I have dual citizenship. My mom was from right here in Boston while my dad grew up in England. Spent a lot of time back and forth when I was really young until my dad married my stepmother. My dad has a law firm with offices here and in London. He's mostly in London." Emma winced at the bitterness in Killian's tone when he mentioned his father.

"That's cool. I'm going to check out my room and I'll meet you guys downstairs. I'm ready to party!" Ruby's excitement was almost a relief even if it was a complete reversal from her invasive line of questioning. Emma knew it was because Killian mentioned his father. A subject that, after such a short time knowing him, even Ruby knew better than to pursue.

Killian walked another few feet and stopped again. "So when I offered you a room, I knew this room was meant for you," Killian unlocked the door. "Ladies first."

Emma stepped into the room and Killian followed. She dropped her bag and walked down a short hallway into the room. It was larger than the whole apartment she and Ruby shared. It had light yellow walls, a four poster bed with a canopy backed up to the wall on her left and there was a fireplace with an oversized armchair and footstool directly in front of her. It looked like a wonderful place to curl up and read. There was also an antique, wooden desk, one that appeared to match the four poster bed, in the middle of the room. The desk acted as a space divider between the sleeping and working area of the room. Emma wandered toward the large window seat that was flanked by two bookshelves, running her hands over a few of the volumes on the shelves.

The window seat was deep and had several layers of pillows stacked on it. The window overlooked the backyard where Emma could see a pool and small pool house. She continued her exploration and walked through a large closet into an equally large bathroom. It had a standing shower, jetted tub and a private toilet.

Emma turned to find Killian leaning against the door to the closet. "So you like it? It was my mom's room when she was younger. My biological mom, not my stepmother. I don't know Diane Jones except from pictures and Liam and Ingrid's stories because she died bringing me into the world. This room helps give me a sense of who she was."

"Killian, I'm so sorry." Emma said walking over and taking Killian's left hand. She knew he had a stepmother but this was the first time he had told her what happened to his mother. She had done the same thing in vaguely telling him about her relationship with Granny and Ruby, but not going back to the source of it. She wanted to tell him, now felt like a good time. "I never met my parents. I was left on the side of a highway as a newborn. I had it rough until Ruby's grandmother adopted me. So I understand what it's like to not know your parent but have a wonderful person who took over that job of loving and protecting. Biology is only one part of family. I think family is also about who you choose and who chooses you," Emma confided, failing to hold back a tear.

Killian's right hand brushed against her cheek, his thumb wiping her tear. Emma shivered and Killian pulled his hand away abruptly. "Emma, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have-"

"It's ok," Emma assured. Who she was giving the assurance to, she wasn't quite certain.

* * *

Emma woke up the next morning, almost afternoon if the clock on the side table was right, only vaguely aware of how she had made it back to her room. After the deeply personal moment she and Killian shared, they had exited the room and gone downstairs joining different groups of people. Maybe about fifty people had shown up throughout the evening. Originally she had been disappointed that so few had shown up, but Will insisted that quality, not quantity was what mattered for any party they had.

Shifting out of the bed, it took a few minutes to brush her teeth and hair. She stumbled down the back stairwell into the kitchen. Surprisingly she was one of the last people awake. Mary Margaret and Regina had stayed the night. David sat next to Mary Margaret grinning too brightly for someone who should still be drunk. Belle was in Will's lap, rather than a chair, Robin was busy grabbing pancakes off stack on a plate in the center of the table. There was a selection of fruit, bacon, sausage, fried eggs, breakfast potatoes and maple syrup laid out in addition to the pancakes.

Everyone was passing food back and forth, Emma sat down across from Ruby. Half tucked against Ruby's right side was a dark haired Asian beauty (Emma knew this must be the girl Ruby had talked about before she just couldn't remember if Ruby told Emma her name) and on Ruby's left was a blond haired guy who seemed clueless to his surroundings, and was half asleep at the table.

"Emma, don't know if you remember, but this is Mulan," Ruby motioned to her right, "and this is Chase," waving in the direction of her half asleep companion.

"Oi, we wait until everyone is at the table to recount the previous evening's activity. If you forgot something, then we will help fill it in," Will exclaimed from the other end of the long table.

"Sounds like bullshit to me," Ruby objected.

Robin held up his hand, "I know that's what I had said when we first established our post party recap. Hear the method out before you trash it."

Killian sat to Emma's left. "Ok, I'm done cooking now and Emma's the last awake so we can begin. Belle, want to review how this works?"

"So for those that don't know, Killian, Dave, Jimmy," - 'Dave's twin', Killian interjected. Belle glared before continuing, "Robin, Will, Killian's sister Anna and I all attended the same boarding school. Of course they had rules against consumption of alcohol but we had a secret place that we would hold parties and it wasn't hard to get alcohol smuggled in. We would have wild parties and the next morning, have almost no idea what happened. So we developed a system. We would review the memories of the prior night at breakfast in the dining hall. We start with the last person to wake up, who relates their memories for the night before. If you tell a lie and a least two others can attest that you didn't in fact do as claimed, then you take a shot. If there are differing stories as to your true action, it's a rumor and everyone drinks. If another person said you did something and your memory differed, then you call them out on it and if it cannot be proven true, that person would have to do a shot for each lie next time."

"So it's basically a drinking game that allows someone to call shenanigans on the prior evening's actions?" Regina asked, leaning on the table to look down at Belle, her large breasts coming to rest on the surface of the table. Emma tried to ignore the lecherous look Robin had as he stared down Regina's shirt. Emma was damn sure Regina knew the view she was displaying. There was some spark or something between Regina and Robin. Damn, Killian was a really good matchmaker.

"Yeah. It got everyone hammered quick at the following party but as we are in a private home and not at school: I've got the tequila. So shots start now," Robin commanded. David and Will groaned in unison.

"Who the bloody hell left Robin in charge of alcohol choice?" Killian demanded. Will's hand shot up as his head smacked onto the table.

"Haha, I have no pity. This is payback for the vodka shots last time," Robin's tone was gleeful as he hopped up to grab shot glasses for everyone.

"So then Emma starts, is that it?" Mary Margaret asked, looking around the table for confirmation.

"Yeah," Robin nodded.

"So Emma, what do you remember?" Ruby asked, grinning wickedly.

Emma smiled. She had a really clear memory of everything up to how she got upstairs to her bed. That was the only part that the alcohol haze affected. She had had a hell of a night.

"Well I started the evening by kicking Scarlet's ass at poker," Emma grinned, "It was-"

"Bollocks! I firmly attest that no such thing occurred!" Will interrupted, glaring at Emma.

"No way mister," Emma pulling a piece of paper of of her pocket. She handed it across the table to Ruby. "Read that if you please."

"'I, William Scarlet III, owe Emma Swan $905 for losses sustained in several games of poker on the night of 8 September 2006,' and then it's signed as William Scarlet. Belle French and Robin Locksley are signed under witnesses. Killian Jones is listed as having drafted the document," Ruby announced as she finished reading the info on the sheet.

Emma reached over and grabbed it from Ruby's hands. "So yeah, have a shot, Will. Also if you don't want to lose large sums, don't let that one egg you on," Emma scolded, pointing at David. "So that happened first. Then Robin and I dominated the beer pong for a few rounds before Regina and Mary Margaret defeated us. After that, I know we all had a lot to drink and most had reached the point of no return but I wondered to the kitchen and ate a slice of cake before returning-"

"No, that's not correct. You had three slices of cake before you came back," Mulan interjected, speaking for the first time since Emma sat down. Apparently she was awake now, or at least less reluctant to curl in Ruby's side. "I watched you for like, maybe three or four minutes before I… before I was distracted," Mulan finished.

"I didn't even see you in the kitchen," Emma questioned. She was really confused how Mulan could've seen anything. Emma liked chocolate and the cake had been so good. With the alcohol blocking her inhibitions a little, she had consumed more food than was wise for someone drinking alcohol for the first time.

"Well I was in the pantry which has a nice view of the kitchen when the door is open. The light in the pantry was off but I could see out," Mulan explained.

"What the bloody hell were you doing in the pantry?" Killian asked, though the red on the tips of his pointed ears indicated he had some idea.

"She wasn't doing anything," Ruby smirked. "She was merely laying on the table in the pantry. Chase and I were feasting."

And chorus of groans sounded around the table. "Love, try to keep the fornication to your bedroom next time, thanks. Also, when we're done here, you're cleaning that table and every surface in the pantry," Killian

Will snickered, "Ruby, you've inadvertently supplied Mr. Obsessive Compulsive Disorder with a need to clean the whole place. He might ask you to clean it but he's going to follow after you and do it again."

"Hey, now. One of us needs to keep this place ship shape," Killian decreed. "Lord knows it won't be any of you lot."

"There's a cleaning lady who comes twice a week, mate. You don't have to worry," Robin insisted.

"Okay, so can I get back to my story, or what?" Emma asked, trying to keep calm. Emma took her shot from Robin and downed it, shuddering as the liquid burned her throat. "So I ate a bunch of cake and then returned to find Belle, Mary Margaret and Killian engaged in a drunk spelling bee. I've never seen anything more hilarious in my life than you three trying to outdo the other as you tried to spell, with only mildly slurred speech, insanely complex words I couldn't spell sober," Emma mused.

"Hey, at least I don't throw sharp objects at people's backsides when they are drunk," Killian accused, finger wagging at her.

"What the hell?" Emma was confused. "I did not such thing. Did anyone witness me throw something at Killian's ass?"

"I think he just wants to have us all sit around and talk about his ass. Like it's God's gift to women or something. Ha!" Regina quipped, tucking her short black hair out of her face, "You're just full of it."

Robin snorted at Regina's comment at the same time he was taking a drink and started coughing violently. Regina turned her attention to Robin, saying something Emma couldn't quite hear. Robin recovered quickly. 

"So, Killian just take a shot," Belle's amusement was clear as she ordered Killian to drink. "Emma isn't guilty of throwing stuff at your ass. Emma, finish telling what you remember."

"After eating all that cake, I had a few cups of punch and wandered around for a while. I remember finding my way upstairs and curling up in a blanket but it's after that the details get foggy. I'm not really 100% sure how I ended up back in my bed, but I remember a little flash of someone carrying me to my bed."

"Can't be any worse than David. He slept in his bathtub and insisted Mary Margaret take his bed. He was so drunk that Mary Margaret gave in just to stop him from getting upset," Regina said, clearly enjoying the red-faced looks from David and Mary Margaret.

"Swan, you fell asleep in my bed. I carried you to your room. You got sick and I held your hair for you before getting you tucked into bed," Killian admitted, his eyes not meeting Emma's. She had a feeling what he wasn't saying was that he had helped her change. Emma woke in her pajamas and it couldn't have been Ruby who was too busy getting laid. "I was a gentleman, love, I was just helping out a friend, making sure you were alright." And Emma knew it was true. Killian wouldn't have done anything untoward while she was in a drunken state.

She sent Killian a look, one that said they'd have to talk about what he wasn't saying though she didn't want to talk about it here in front of everyone. Since Emma had concluded her story, things switched to Ruby next. Ruby, as Emma thought, had a wild night of sex with Mulan and Chase all over the house, which as Emma pointed out, was a bit of an overshare but no one else commented on it. David remembered very little of the evening, but had the details filled in by the rest of the people at the table. Will remembered more of the evening then David but less than Emma. Belle had dragged Will "to sleep" not long after Emma had disappeared to the kitchen to eat food which had ultimately ended up being thrown up.

Emma started to lose count of the number of shots being done around the table. She didn't feel hungover from last night and after eating breakfast she felt ready for the day. Drinking so much would definitely take some getting used to and when she voiced that concern, Will smiled and slid the bottle of alcohol her way.

"Nothing like the 'air of the dog to cure what ails you," Will joked, "We've got another two nights to go. Plus Ruby said your 18th birthday is next month so we'll be doing this again for you. November for Belle and then December for Rob and Kil's birthdays. So now you're part of this family, you'll learn eventually to party like the best of us," Will's cheery, informative tone settled his words as fact.

"Here, here!" Robin cried, raising his glass in a toast. Everyone filled their glass and raised them.

"To the family we choose," Killian toasted, standing to touch his glass to everyone else's before knocking back his shot. His smiling blue eyes met Emma's as everyone else finished their shots and she smiled back. The idea that this group of friends would treat her like family was strange, mostly because no one had wanted her for a majority of her life. She started to change over the last month as she let more people, like Granny, Ruby, Mary Margaret and Killian, get to know the real Emma, which was more than she had done all three of the years since she was removed from foster care. Her mind was made up then: she and Killian couldn't be more than friends or she'd lose everything that she stood to gain as a member of this family. Because if things went south, no one would chose her.


	5. Fighting Fear

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Back in 2016, the weekend away begins.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so proud of this chapter as we arrive back to 2016’s Emma and Killian. It’s been a bit of a walk through their past to get back here so hopefully it doesn’t disappoint. (We will still flashback to their past every now and then). Chapter 6 should be up around Christmas Eve. Enjoy!
> 
> If you want to be tagged on future Tumblr posts for this, just send a message or ask to Katealexandra26.tumblr.com.

**_April 1, 2016_ **

When Killian and Emma arrived at home, Killian went to his room to pack while Emma carried Henry, too close to his nap time to be his normal energetic self, to the kitchen to give him lunch and pack a cooler for their trip. 

Emma sat Henry at his play area off of the kitchen where she could watch as she pulled a variety of food out of the fridge and cabinets for lunch and anything snacks for the drive out to the beach house. She called Henry into the kitchen and helped him wash his hands as Killian came down the back stairwell into the kitchen. He was wearing tan shorts and a light blue polo shirt that just made his piercing blue eyes even more attractive than normal. 

“Swan, I’ll finish giving him his lunch if you want to go pack,” Killian nodded, sitting down with Henry. Emma start to walk away when he called out, “Oh, I checked responses to the email you sent out. Everyone will be coming. Liam and Elsa are already out there this weekend and he said the more the merrier. Anna and Kris are apparently coming too, though I had to hear it from Liam. I’m kinda upset she didn’t tell me they were arriving home today,” Killian pouted, displaying behavior more suited to the actual child in their house.

Emma leaned against the door frame at the bottom of the stairs and laughed. “You know your sister doesn’t plan that far in advance. They probably registered their flight last minute. It takes little over an hour and ten minutes for them to fly from State College to Logan. She didn’t mean to hurt your feelings by not telling you. She probably just wanted to surprise us, that’s all. You know how busy she is with her thesis, so try to give her a break. Are they coming here and driving with us?” 

Anna might be a few months older than Emma _AND_ a PhD student but sometimes Anna acted very impulsively in a way that belied her age and intellectual maturity. Killian was usually responsible and calculating as far as possible outcomes from his actions. In spite of their opposite nature, Killian had taken Anna into his heart as his sister more than two decades ago and Killian loved her without condition. Emma had learned over the years that love for one’s siblings and being angry or annoyed at them were not mutually exclusive states. 

“No, she and Kris are just taking her car straight to the beach. They already stopped at mom’s place and grabbed their beach stuff. I sent Kris a text since Anna’s probably driving now but as he was the one flying earlier, he probably still has his phone turned off,” Killian said, his frustration showing as he leaned over to wipe a glob of peanut butter from Henry’s face. “You’re just as messy an eater as your mom and your Aunt Anna, my lad,” Henry struggled against the napkin Killian was using to clean his face. Poor kid needed a nap desperately.

“I’m not _that_ bad, thank you very much. I’m going to pack our stuff,” Emma complained, making her annoyance at being placed in the same category with her three year old and Anna, who was the least graceful person Emma knew, very clear as she turned with dramatic flair and ran up the stairs. 

It took her all of ten minutes to pack a bag for Henry. Returning to her room to pack her own bag was an altogether more challenging task. Emma closed the door to her room, which she didn’t do very often and threw items out of her closet onto her bed. She couldn’t decide what to wear and she was never this difficult about packing. It was just a family gathering. All of these people at seen her at her very worst.

_It’s not everyone I want to impress. It’s Killian. I want him to see me at my best._ Emma looked around as if to make sure she hadn’t uttered the words aloud. Emma flung herself across her bed and laid staring at the ceiling for a minute. She was acting like a teenager with a crush. 

Except that it was more than a crush. She’d known Killian for almost a decade. He was her best friend. And granted, they had blurred the lines between friend and more than friends over the years, but every time he had followed her lead and not allowed those missteps to ruin their relationship.

The year before Henry was born, their relationship was at its worst point and was almost destroyed by their collective stupidity. Emma and Killian hadn’t really had serious relationships since starting college, so when Emma got involved with Neal, Killian had hated him immediately and Emma never wanted to admit she knew why it bothered him so much. Her best friend being a man had caused tension between her and Neal so often that they broke up a few times after fighting over Killian. They always got back together after Neal calmed down. 

Not long after she started seeing Neal, Killian found himself in the middle of an affair with his married law professor. Emma tried to tell Killian multiple times his professor was simply taking advantage of him. Emma was disappointed that Killian, who believed so highly in good form, was okay being used as a tool for his professor to get out of her broken marriage. Killian hadn’t taken it well she called him a tool - _actually_ she had called him an adulterous tool - but no matter what she called him, that day was one of the worst in her life. It had been the straw that finally broke their friendship and for the first time since they’d meet, they went days, then weeks which faded into months without speaking. Until just after her 23rd birthday when their friends threw a party for her combining it with a Halloween bash. They had gotten so drunk and finally talked, agreeing to put the anger behind them. That was the first healing step.

A few weeks later when she and Neal had another of their own fights and he up and disappeared one night, Emma spent the night in her old room at Granny’s , in an effort not to break the fragile truce she had with Killian. And Granny hadn’t pushed her or asked her to explain, just making sure Emma had a decently cooked meal for breakfast and lunch. That evening when she returned to her and Neal’s apartment to find her stuff outside his apartment with a note to make sure she removed it within 24 hours otherwise it’d be thrown out, the first person she called was Killian. 

The first person she could always called was Killian. She had known then how much she truly cared, but Killian was with someone else and, even as fucked up as that relationship was, she held back because she decided in that moment that if all she could have was friendship, it was better to put aside the part that wanted more than risk losing him in her life forever. She’d come so close to that happening and never wanted to feel that again. 

So Emma was there for Killian _as a friend_ when Milah decided she didn’t want to be tied down by labels or even the open relationship she and Killian had developed. _Companions in heartbreak_ , he’d said. And then Henry changed things between them once again. When Henry was born Emma was forced to drop out from her medical program before her final year and when bill collectors came calling she refused to allow Killian to pay for everything she needed and applied for jobs in any and every field. She took the first job that was offered simply because they had on-site child care and she had to pay her student loans without burdening Killian (who was still in law school) with the responsibility of raising her child, paying for the all of their expenses AND her student loans. She accepted that he would not let her pay to live with him and that he’d never let her starve or worry about food. But letting him pay her student loans? No matter how much money need he had, her pride wouldn’t let her do that.

After Killian completed school he tried to convince Emma to go back and finish what she’d started but the passion she had for being a doctor had been spoiled by dealing with the worst of humanity everyday in a call center. He stopped pushing her after a while. They settled into a sort of pattern of working and raising Henry. Neither of them had dated others since Henry had been born. Emma knew it was because of what had happened the last time they had been with others. But the celibacy, that was the worst part. Batteries only did so much. 

Suddenly Emma’s reverie was interrupted by a loud knock on her door. “Swan, you fall asleep in there or what?”

“Yeah, sorry Kil. I’m almost packed. Can you grab Henry’s bag and the cooler and put it in the car?” Emma shouted, scrambling from the bed and getting back to packing. The trip down memory lane could wait. They needed to get on the road soon to beat traffic to the shore. This was their first time at the shore this year. Early April to late September often found them at the beach or on one of Killian’s yachts with their family and Emma looked forward to it as much as she knew Killian did. 

Emma grabbed a varied selection of clothing that included two pairs of jeans, a few t-shirts and a sweater for the evenings that would still have a slight chill, all of it quickly folded and placed into her suitcase with speed that surprised her. Emma packed her sexiest underwear, swimsuits and her favorite dress. And without any second thoughts she tucked a small black silk bag into the pocket inside her suitcase, just in case. Batteries - check.

Ten minutes later she was at the bottom of the front stairs with her bag in hand. Killian was kicking a soft soccer ball around the living room. Henry was doing very well keeping up for a little boy who hadn’t had a nap until he kicked the soft ball right into Killian’s head. Henry’s look of shock turned to laughter as Killian rushed him and threw him over his shoulder and spun around. 

Henry’s shouts of “No, daddy! Please let me go!” in between bouts of laughter caused Emma’s heart to clench in her chest. Emma tried to discourage Henry from calling Killian “daddy” but every time he did, Emma felt such joy and maybe she should just let her son decide. She knew Killian loved when Henry called him daddy because his face would light up like a child on Christmas who had just received the best gift in the world. 

“Mommy, help me!” Henry shouted as Killian stopped spinning but still held Henry off the ground.

“Ok, I guess,” Emma let out an exaggerated sigh and put her bag down, “but only because I want to get to the beach sometime today.”

Killian gasped and put Henry down, “Lad, why didn’t you tell me we were going to the beach? I wouldn’t have spun you about like that. We haven’t a moment to lose. To the car!”

Henry ran to her, Emma grinned at Killian as she lifted Henry into her arms, hugging him to her. Killian’s bright smile in reply warmed her as he grabbed the bags and followed her to the garage. 

* * *

Killian hadn’t even made it outside of Boston before the soft sounds of snoring were coming from both mother and son. He laughed to himself. This was why he both loved and hated taking road trips with Emma and Henry. They were so alike that it made his heart ache with love when Henry exhibited some of Emma’s best traits. Best of all the things Henry had inherited from his mother were his green eyes. 

God, he was in so deep. He had loved Emma so long and loved her son from the minute he had known of his existence. Henry was his son in all the ways that mattered. It was a choice he had made the day Emma had called crying that Neal had left her. She hadn’t even had a day before Neal had her stuff boxed outside his apartment with a note explaining she had a day to remove everything. Neal had his own stuff packed by movers, terminated his lease and set off with Doctors Without Borders for an undetermined length of time.

Killian hadn’t even hesitated in his actions to help Emma. Milah had been so angry and demanded he put Emma out of his home, which he could never have done. He thought he had loved Milah and in a way he had, but he couldn’t deny that what he felt for Emma was stronger, truer, than anything he had ever felt. But they had almost destroyed their friendship and he knew she had locked a part of her heart away because she feared losing him. So he did his best to be there for her. For Henry. Every single day. Living together and helping raise Henry felt so natural, so right.

And while he couldn’t regret having them in his life, there were days he wanted more than what they had. It was probably selfish but he wanted to have one and all know that they were were a family. He didn’t want to see Emma’s face flash between joy and fear every single time Henry called him daddy. Killian wanted to be able to love Emma freely and hold her in his arms whenever he (or she) desired. To have her in his bed. And not in the way they had shared a bed many times in the last decade.

  
_Fuck._ Killian was going to drive himself insane if he didn’t stop. Images of Emma, golden hair spread on his pillows, hands grasping at his sheets, as he drove into her wildly, her moaning his name, came unbidden to his mind. He shook the images from his head. He had kept his desire for her in check for the last four years, he needed to get a grip. He glanced at her sleeping form. He didn’t want to push her but thinking about how she had looked at him earlier when he picked her up from work had almost set him on fire. He reached over to brush a fallen lock of her soft hair out of her face. He didn’t want to lose her, but he wanted to know if she could ever truly be his. To tell her how long he had been hers and that it would be so for as long as she wished. 

Killian, alone with his thoughts for the rest of the drive, was relieved to pull up to the gate of his family’s summer house. Making his way up the drive, he was glad for the privacy the compound offered. Except they had invited all of their friends and it would be crowded. Hardly the atmosphere to tell his best friend that he wanted more. That he was tired of the blurred lines between the friend zone and a true relationship. 

Maybe he could take Emma out on his sailboat, alone, to watch the dawn. As much as she wasn’t a morning person, he knew she loved the sunrises when they came to the beach. He’d talk to one of his sisters about watching Henry for them tomorrow morning. 

Killian reached over and gently tapped Emma’s shoulder. “Wake up, love. We’re about halfway down the drive now. You may want to take a minute and freshen up.”

* * *

Emma slowly sat up, groggy from her nap and rubbed the sleep from her eyes. 

Killian cleared his throat and nodded at her face. 

She had been drooling in her sleep. “Ugh, ew. Why didn’t you lead with that?” Emma shrieked, wiping her face and grabbing her compact from the bag at her feet. 

“It’s cuter to watch you freak out,” Killian snickered.

Emma was going to scold him further but Henry was awake in the back seat. 

“Are we there yet?” Henry asked. 

“Yes, bug, we’re almost there. Remember you aren’t allowed to go near the water without an adult present. And make sure you tell us, or an adult, if you have to go potty, ok?” Emma was so over potty training. Henry was good most days but sometimes he wouldn’t tell anyone he had to go. Killian was constantly reassuring her that she wasn’t a bad mother because her son refused to be fully potty trained. 

“Ok, mommy. Is Sarah and Roland here?”

“Yeah, Aunt Ruby and Aunt Dottie said they were coming this weekend. So is Uncle Robin and Aunt Regina. There will be many of your aunts and uncles here this weekend. And all of your cousins.”

Killian was pulling into the area of the main house and there were already so many cars. They must be the last to arrive. Killian might have suggested it last minute, but everyone had arranged to be off work and made it before they had. They all must be eager to get their summer season started.

“How did everyone get here before us?”

“Dave, Regina and Dottie left the office at the same time I did and I might have mentioned it as a possibility that we would be here. As Will and Belle don’t have traditional jobs, they are always free so no surprise there. And Liam has been off since Elsa was sick on Tuesday and they have been here most of the week,” Killian explained. 

“And Anna drives like a bat out of hell so I’m never surprised by her arriving on time,” Emma shivered, having been in a car with Anna a few times, it wasn’t an experience that she enjoyed. 

Killian parked and got out to grab their bags. Emma unbuckled Henry and let him down inside, but the door opened and Elsa and Liam came out to greet them. Followed by Ruby, Dottie and their daughter Sarah. Sarah ran straight to Henry.

“Henry!” Sarah cried. She was tall for her five years, her light brown hair swinging into her face as she struggled to lift Henry off the ground.

“Sarah Grace, put your cousin down now! You aren’t that much bigger than he is and you don’t want to hurt anyone, do you?” Dottie scolded, helping make sure both children had their feet firmly on the ground. Sarah apologized and grabbed Henry’s hand to walk inside the house.

“Thanks Dottie,” Emma hugged her sister in law.

“My turn,” Ruby whined, pulling Emma from Dottie’s arms into her own. “Thank you for inviting us. This weekend is always so hard to spend at home,” Ruby’s voice cracked a little as a few tears streaked her face.

Emma wiped them away, doing her best to comfort Ruby, knowing the grief behind the tears. “Sarah takes after him so much. He’d be proud of you for raising such a beautiful little girl.”

“He’d be 30 on Monday, you know? I love my life, I truly do. But it’s hard, sometimes, living in his house, raising his daughter and facing the unfairness of him never knowing how wonderful she is…,” Ruby said softly, tears falling as they walked away from the group a bit.

Emma eyed Dottie and saw Ruby follow her gaze. “My wife is the most understanding woman in the world. She knows I love her, but she gets that I loved Graham too and a small part of who I am comes from that,” Ruby smiled through her tears. 

Emma met Killian’s eyes and gave him a silent nod to proceed into the house. He nodded back, the realization dawning on him as to why Ruby had immediately gone for her. Emma had lost a very good friend when her brother in law had died. Emma and Ruby sat down in a pair of chairs on the front porch, talking for several minutes before Ruby apologized and directed them into the house. 

“You don’t have to ever apologize for this, Rubes. I couldn’t imagine what it’d be like if…” Emma stopped herself from saying if she lost Killian. Because it wasn’t the same. Ruby had been newly married and pregnant when her husband died in a car accident. She and Killian, well, they just couldn’t compare to something like that.

“If you lost Killian?” Ruby asked seriously.

“Ruby, we aren’t together. We aren’t like you and Graham,” Emma sputtered, embarrassed she had voiced the thought out loud.

“You might not be married or even acknowledging that you are, but you guys are a couple. You live together, don’t date others, you’re raising a son together and you love each other more than any two people I’ve ever seen. Sometimes it’s subtle like when it’s a glance, a silent conversation and sometimes watching you, I can’t understand how the two of you aren’t fucking each other’s brains out. You guys are just really fucking stubborn about what is plain to everyone else. Life is short Emma, I should know, so stop wasting time denying it,” Ruby finished.

Emma felt upset by Ruby’s words, but Emma knew it was the truth. Hadn’t she come here this weekend with the intention to talk with Killian about how she really felt, consequences be damned? “I know, Ruby. I intend to tell Killian how I feel. I’m just scared. That saying it out loud will make it all real and I’ll lose him somehow,” Emma confessed, feeling the fear still weighing on her. 

Ruby smiled as they made their way into the busy kitchen, “There’s nothing to fear.”

Elsa was talking to Killian who had his back to her, clearly Emma had arrived in the middle of a conversation. “There are so many people here, we haven’t hosted all of our friends and kids at once before. It’s always been smaller groups. And mom is here and since she is out at the cottage I cannot put anyone else out there,” Elsa frowned before turning to Emma, sighing as she began. “Emma, I had to give your usual room to Sarah and Rose, since it’s right between Ruby and Dottie’s room and Will and Belle’s room. I couldn’t put them across the house from their parents,” Elsa explained her sound logic, continuing to move around the kitchen gracefully weaving through the crowd that was humming through the area.

Killian must have made a face at his sister because Elsa was glaring at him fiercely. Anna, sitting across from Killian with food in front of her, began speaking with her mouth half full, “Kil, get over it. You and Emma have shared a house for the better part of a decade. And pretty much everyone in this house has seen the others naked at one point or another, although we were probably drunk so maybe not everyone remembers going skinny dipping like six or seven years ago, so that’s not a big deal, right? But, anyway, you and Emma can peaceably share a room for a few days, can’t you?”

Ruby leaned in and whispered in her ear, “Definitely nothing to fear.”

Emma swallowed the lump in her throat. She and Killian would be sharing a bed for the next three nights. And the thought filled her with equal parts fear and anticipation. Ruby was wrong about nothing to fear: Emma feared she wouldn’t be needing the batteries she had packed.


	6. This Dance We Do

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Emma and Killian spend the evening with their family before facing the prospect of an evening in the same bed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So here is Chapter 6 two weeks later than I originally intended. My mom was in the hospital (she’s home and better now) so everything got sidetracked. This is one of the longest single chapters I’ve ever written so hopefully it's not an incoherent pile of rubbish. This was not beta'd so all mistakes are my own. I'd love to hear from you lovely readers as to your thoughts on this chapter and/or the story this far.

"Anna, don't talk with you mouth full! And perhaps it's best not to regale your mother with your drunken escapades and debauchery," a voice from the doorway called. Ingrid Jones, her graying blond hair pulled into a ponytail, stepped fully into the kitchen. Ingrid's warning about debauchery helped Emma squash all of the inappropriate thoughts swimming around in her head.

"Mum!" Killian and Anna exclaimed in unison as he rushed from his chair to hug Ingrid, who found herself in the middle of a hug from both Killian and Anna. Emma had once thought it weird that Anna called Ingrid mom, but she had been a little girl of barely six when her parents died and she called Ingrid "mom" because Killian and Liam had. So even though she was their aunt, she became their mother. Although Liam and Elsa never regarded each other as siblings in the way Killian and Anna had and did. Teenagers when their families merged, they fell in love at a young age and had been together almost twenty years now.

It had been a complex situation to explain and Killian had done so right from the start. In hindsight, it became a building block that helped Emma understand that family wasn't always blood and as adopted kid herself, she knew that but she didn't truly embrace, at least until she got to know Killian, that it was the ties like love and friendship, that bound someone as family. Emma shook her head and watched the joyous reunion.

"Anna, I'm so glad you and Kris made it home safe. I can't believe I haven't seen you in four months," Ingrid exclaimed, cupping Anna's face and kissing her forehead, before doing the same to Killian.

"And Killian, I can't believe you haven't texted me in over a week. I mean, seriously? Emma can't use her phone except at her breaks and she texts me more than you do. Then any of my kids do. I mean, I'm pretty sure she's the only one who loves me," Ingrid pouted jokingly.

Emma hugged Ingrid as Anna, Elsa, Killian and Liam started a heated argument about who loved Ingrid most and who was the best kid. The Jones/Arendelle clan was a competitive bunch if there ever was one.

"Guys, knock it off, or we will never get dinner on the table and these kids in bed by their bedtimes," Emma warned. That seemed to snap them all out of it and resulted in dinner being resolved in less than fifteen minutes. Competitive bunch who certainly enjoyed challenges; not at all easy to manipulate into a game of one-upmanship on creating the best dish for dinner. No, sir! Emma loved to enjoy the results of the storm of activity they created in the kitchen. Elsa, Anna and Mary Margaret had taught her to cook over the years, but Emma didn't enjoy it as much as sitting down to a meal without the work. Killian cooked for them mostly or their housekeeper helped Emma make a bunch of meals at once that they could freeze and reheat later.

Emma wandered out of the kitchen to find Belle and Mary Margaret lounging on the couch in the living room, their feet propped up. Both of the women were expecting their second child during the summer. Emma hugged Mary Margaret, then Belle before she plopped down in one of the armchairs as they discussed pregnancy. Regina walked out of the house, curling up next to Mary Margaret.

"Ingrid is really enjoying having all of the children here. I am so grateful for her. She's the only grandparent most of our children know and she is so wonderful at loving them all," Regina said with a wistful smile. "Mary Margaret and I haven't seen Cora since her sentencing. I'm content to let her rot in her cell at Danbury." Emma could feel the anger radiating from Regina. Regina, at least knew mention of her mother's name would be upsetting and had a firm grip on Mary Margaret's hand, carefully eyeing her sister for signs that the combination of grief and pregnancy would reduce Mary Margaret to tears. When Emma had met her, she never would've imagined a day that these two women would have such a strong bond. "I'm sorry to mention her. I only mean to say that Robin and I never intend for Roland to meet _HER_ , so Roland doesn't having any other living grandparents."

Emma sighed, they had all lost so much over the years. Accidents and crime aside, half of their family had lost parents to cancer. The cycle of life took parents away, one way or another but Emma hated the cruelty of cancer's destructive nature. She brushed away her tears, focusing on the positive, "Ingrid is the best. I mean she hasn't been the same since Brennan passed but I know she has so much love to give and having so many children to love and spoil brings her tremendous joy."

"You know the first time went to England to visit our families with Rose, my dad and Will's parents were confused by Rose asking for Gramma Ing. They thought she had a speech impediment. I love visiting England and seeing my dad and in laws but this is home. We all haven't been in the same place since Christmas and with everything going on," Belle's waved her hand over her burgeoning stomach, "I'm glad for some consistency. My dad and Will's parents are …"

"Stuffy?" Mary Margaret prompted, trying not to snort.

"I was going to say overly traditional, maybe distant or absent, but stuffy works too. Don't get me wrong, I love my father but I was raised primarily by a nanny, so was Will. And when Dad's work here in the States ended, he was content to leave me in boarding school here at thirteen years old. Will's parents lived in New York up until our junior year. After his sister died, they abandoned Will here, though he wouldn't have gone back to England willingly at that point. Anyway, you guys have all been there and I'm just glad to have you all in my life," Belle confessed.

Will walked into the room from the sitting room, sensing he had stepped into a heavy conversation, he took a moment to survey them before he spoke, "Ladies, I'm sorry to interrupt but dinner is being served out in the garden. My darling," Will helped his wife from her seat. Regina and Mary Margaret got up and walked arm in arm outside. Will paused to offer a smile and his other arm to Emma, "Come on, Emma. I'm starving. Got to eat for two you know."

He winked and Belle rolled her eyes. Emma hooked her arm in Will's and they set off for the outside dining area. Emma loved eating on the outdoor terrace here. It had a spectacular view of the ocean and the table had enough extensions and benches to accommodate all fourteen adults and seven children in the same place. Henry was already seated with Leo on his left and Killian on his right. Ruby and Killian left enough space on the bench between them for Emma.

Liam sat at the head of table with Elsa, nearly seven old Brennan to her right and four year old Kieran and Ingrid opposite. Everyone had settled down as Liam stood to raise his glass in a toast.

"So many of you know Elsa has been ill the last few weeks. We had the doctor stop by and we've found out that we are expecting again," Liam beamed.

"Hopefully, this one is a girl," his wife chimed in, "There hasn't been a Jones daughter in the last three generations," Elsa informed the gathering as she wrapped her arms around her husband's waist.

Everyone wished them their congratulations and as they were about to move on to dinner, Robin and Regina stood as well.

Robin blushed, but grasped Regina's hand firmly, smiling ear to ear. "We were going to wait to tell everyone. You all know how long and difficult a road we've had the last few years, but this last round of IVF worked."

"We're expecting twins!" Regina squealed. Turning to Liam and Elsa she apologized, "I hope you don't mind that we have stole your thunder a bit. But we've officially made it to the second trimester and both babies are doing well." Assurances were given that Liam and Elsa were happy for them and in no way upset regarding the nature of their announcement.

Emma was so happy for Regina. Her infertility issues after Roland had caused her and Robin more grief than Emma could imagine. It said a lot for their resiliency that they continued to try for children and that their loss hadn't driven them apart. Four of her friends were going to have a second child. Must have been something in the water in the last year just as there had been around the time they had all graduated, because Roland, Leo, Rose, and Sarah were born in the following year graduation. Emma had been welcome latecomer to the mommy club. Her medical training gave her a basis for what to expect and Killian had kept her well supplied with different research at all stages of her pregnancy but she remembered how nice it had been to have a bevy of new moms to ask questions about their own experiences. What would it be like to experience it all over again at this point in her life? Not that she didn't love Henry, but he hadn't been part of her plan.

Emma sat in a contemplative silence until Killian rested his hand on her leg and startled her. Her eyes glanced at his hand before shooting up to meet his for several long seconds.

"Sorry love, but Kris asked you about your work and you were just staring into space," Killian said softly, breaking her trance.

* * *

Killian watched as Emma shook herself and turned to Kristoff to respond.

"It's the same bullshit everyday. I hate it. I don't know how I've been there so long. But I've almost got my student loans paid in full so I haven't thought much beyond that," Emma replied without the normal feeling, or frustration with which she usually displayed when complaining about her job. He knew better than to mention going back to school, at least until she paid of her loans. One final year of schooling and she could be the doctor she once so passionately wished to be. He truly hated seeing that fire go out within her over the last few years.

"I wouldn't know what that's like. I'm lucky my mom works for the university. Otherwise I'd probably be pretty screwed. Getting a PhD in Anthropology isn't exactly cheap," Kris mused.

"Did you ever think about going to another school?" Dottie asked from the opposite end of the table.

"Never. Even if mom didn't get a discounted tuition rate, I'd have still gone to Penn State. I've bled blue and white my whole life," Kris admitted proudly.

Killian laughed as this started an argument over who had the best alma mater. At one time, when most of them had lived in Killian's house, dinner was long drawn out affair for the adults as they could sit talking, or drinking when they were younger, for hours on end but the children were eager, impatient really, to be excused to play. That was how Killian found himself, Liam, Dave, Will and Robin playing a game of tag against all seven children. Kris wandered into the house and probably collapsed on a couch. Killian felt exhausted after a few rounds, wishing he could have gotten in a little nap time for himself, and suggested they show the kids sparklers and firecrackers. The women sat in the chairs around the fireplace as the sun began to set. Killian heard Emma's laugh sounding and turned to see her with a mug of steaming liquid, knowing it was her favored hot chocolate with cinnamon without needing to see or smell the drink. It was her comfort drink, well at least it was her non-alcoholic comfort drink.

"Oi, Kil, pay attention mate, you're going to burn yourself," Will laughed. Killian mumbled a quiet curse realizing the sparkler had burnt down to his hand. He threw it down into the bucket of sand they had brought out for used sparklers, issuing a warning to Henry and Roland, who were nearest to him, not to touch it lest they repeat Killian's error.

"When the bloody hell are you going get your head out of your arse and tell that woman how you feel?" Robin asked, dropping his sparklers into the waste bin.

"Rob, mate, watch the cursing. Leo likes to repeat words he hears to his mother and upsetting my pregnant wife is not on my to do list, thank you. I'll throw you on the fire that is Mary Margaret's rage if it comes down to it," David whispered, looking cautiously at the terrace to ensure his wife hadn't heard.

Killian laughed, almost visualizing an angry Mary Margaret, though having experienced a taste of what David was referring to he didn't need to. He had a feeling that Mary Margaret's anger would be even fiercer about anything that negatively affected her son then he might have experienced from her in their college years. Life had changed them all in subtle and, for some of them, not so subtle ways. Everything settled down for the most part and the thing that Killian found it hard to deal with nowadays was that it wasn't as easy to see everyone all at once as often as they once had. They were still as close as family could be, though it had been a few weeks since he and his mates had had a chance to talk at length.

"I intend to talk to her this weekend. I was going to do it tomorrow at sunrise but after we put Henry to bed, I'll probably sit down with her. I'm just nervous I'm going to ruin it."

Liam, who had been listening from his seated spot on the lawn, glanced over at the younger men. "Little brother, you couldn't ruin it. You'd have to be blind not to see what you two have is special," he interjected, as though there was no disputing it.

Killian shook his head, a few examples popped up in his mind of how close he'd come to running everything a few times, but before he could speak, David spoke up, "Kil, we've seen it. You and Emma, it's magical to see you together. To see you together with Henry. Your love has been the glue holding all of us together as a family for a long time. That love, it's stronger than you realize, so trust in that."

David grasped his shoulder and Killian nodded. He didn't say anything. With everything running through his mind, it was most important to share his thoughts with Emma first. He went back to drawing shapes with the sparklers in the dark to entertain the children.

* * *

 

To the ladies relief, the men took the children into the backyard to play after dinner ended to run off some of their energy. Ingrid retired to her cottage not long after that, going down to bid each of the little ones goodnight before she did. Will and Killian had found some sparklers and were now creating shapes or designs in air that the children called out to them as the darkness of evening settled in. Emma curled up in her own chair around the fire pit, sandwiched between Ruby and Mary Margaret's chairs. Mary Margaret's small baby bump, was more pronounced while seated, especially as she fidgeted to find a comfortable position in the chair. Elsa, Anna and Belle sat on a long cushioned settee with Dottie and Regina taking up the remaining single chairs around the firepit.

Emma realized what was missing, hopping up, ran into the house, and grabbed a few glasses and bottles of wine. She came back and handed one glass and a wine bottle each to Ruby, Dottie and Anna as the rest of the women were pregnant and not indulging in alcohol of any kind. Once the wine had been consumed, Ruby disappeared from her seat, coming back out many minutes later with a large tray covered in steaming mugs, passing one to each lady.

"Ruby, you didn't have to do that," Elsa insisted as she took the glass.

"Years of working in Granny's diner gave me some skills time just doesn't erase. Besides I couldn't send Emma or Anna for it, lord knows we'd be cleaning up some kind of mess," Ruby jested, flashing her brightest smile to the two women in question.

"Hey!" Emma and Anna exclaimed in unison. They laughed loudly at their mutual response, Emma feeling mild effects of the wine they had consumed.

"Drink some of that and shush you. Emma, you really need to be sober for tonight," Ruby informed her, mischief glinting in her eyes.

"Ruby…," Emma warned.

"Why does Emma need to be sober? She doesn't have anywhere to go, does she?" Mary Margaret asked innocently, smiling as she rested her hands on her stomach.

"I don't think it's about going anywhere. I think it's about _coming_ ," Anna concluded, which would've shocked Emma except for the two bottles of wine Anna had consumed already. "Are you and Killian going to finally _sleep_ together?"

"We all know they've slept together before, though maybe under more innocent circumstances," Belle contended.

Emma could feel heat radiating off her from the embarrassment she felt. Only a few other times did she have to endure this kind of scrutiny about her bed partners. Emma was ready to respond when Elsa caught her eye and then looked at her watch.

"Ladies, if you'll excuse me, it's the boys bedtime and I should really help my husband with storytime," as she departed and went down to the lawn to escort Liam and their sons inside. The rest of the women made similar comments and soon they had disappeared inside as well. Except Anna, who had found Kris and wandered away from the house, down to the beach with a blanket tucked under Anna's arm.

Killian came up to her holding Henry in his arms. "Poor lad has tuckered himself out," he advised.

"Well then we should get him ready for bed," Emma proposed, heading into the house.

Bath time was a bit of a struggle, Henry didn't particularly enjoy getting a bath and splashed a lot of water on Killian and Emma. Henry's behavior was likely because he was still very excited about being at the beach. After forty minutes, they finally had Henry in his pajamas, tucked in for his bedtime story, Emma making use of her call center skills to change the tone of her voice for the different character and Killian doing varying accents that never failed to make Henry laugh. They shushed him as Leo, who was sharing the room with Henry, was already asleep. Henry begged them to read the story a second time but before they even finished the second reading, soft snores were emanating from him.

"Swan, why don't you go shower? I'll be in shortly. I just want to go downstairs for a few minutes for a drink," Killian said, slowly extracting himself from Henry's embrace, careful not to wake him.

Emma tried not to think about the fact that she couldn't avoid how she was feeling so close to the moment of truth. She made her way down the hall two rooms to Killian's normal room. It had been decorated for him when Ingrid renovated the whole house and cottage the winter after Brennan passed away as an outlet of grief. It was a perfect room for Killian. White wainscoting halfway up the wall with a navy blue paint on the walls above it. Depictions of ships at sea and some of Emma's own photographs of times summers past graced the walls. Emma's favorite features were the two built-in bookshelves made of the same white wainscoting, populated with volumes of classic books and model ships that flanked the door to the en-suite bathroom.

Emma stripped down and got into the shower, enjoying the scalding hot water pour over her from the multiple shower heads. She stood under the water long after she scrubbed her skin and hair. With the knowledge that she should vacate the shower otherwise she'd be red as a lobster, she exited and grabbed a towel for her hair. She flipped her head upside down, covering it with the towel, twisting it tightly. Standing straight once more, Emma tucked the tail of the towel under the part of towel covering the base of her neck to create a sort of turban look. She wrapped another towel around her body and went to the mirror.

The vented fan in the bathroom didn't prevent the mirror from fogging over completely. Emma didn't really need to see her reflection to apply her moisturizing lotion and her deodorant. She went to the tub and propped her leg up as she applied the lotion to one leg then the other. She applied the deodorant and then a little perfume to her pulse points. She reached for her clothes suddeny realizing she had left them in her bag in the bedroom. She checked the security of her towel wrap and walked out of the bathroom. Killian was back from the kitchen and had fallen asleep in his only boxers on top of the bed. At the sound of her noises he flew awake, eyes scanning the room for the source before landing on her as he slid down from the bed.

"Emma, I was hoping we could take about a few things before we sleep," Killian stammered, fighting himself about whether to step closer or look away. Emma could see the indecision etched in his expression.

Killian was flustered by her nudity, though she was covered very well by the oversized towel. "Oh, come on Killian. You've seen me naked plenty of times before." She smiled and chose to joke because she the butterflies in her stomach made her unsure she was ready for a more serious chat.

Killian's gaze met hers again. Blue eyes smoldering with desire. There was no mistaking the look. She had seen it on his face before. "This is different than before, Emma. I won't let you run from me this time because of how I feel, how I know we both feel. We danced around the truth of it for so long, it's always been there in the background haunting us. I can't be haunted by it any longer. God, Emma, I've loved you for so long," Killian confessed, the words hanging in the air between them.

Emma felt such relief she stood there in utter silence as Killian gazed hopefully at her. She had to say something. But saying something had never been her strong suit. So she took the towel from her hair, shaking it down. Emma reached for the point on her body towel that she had it secured but Killian grabbed her hand to cease her movement.

"Emma, what are you doing?" Killian's hand trembled as he held hers.

"I love you, Killian. We've wasted so much time, I don't want to waste anymore," she threw her arms around his neck and pulled him to her lips.

* * *

At first he kissed her tentatively, but the longer she kissed him, the more his disbelief faded. He kissed her hungrily, like a man who wandered the desert too long without water. He realized his hand was the only thing holding her towel up, and so he let go, slipping the hand that had been holding the towel down to her breast, kneading it in his palm. His other hand threaded into her wet hair, to the base of her neck, angling her head better so he could kiss her deeper. Surrendering her lips to breathe in the vanilla honey smell of her, he created a trail of wet kisses to her neck and then her breasts, taking each nipple into his mouth in turn.

Emma moaned, running her nails down his back and into his boxers. Her hands drifted from his cheeks to his cock, one hand stroking it firmly, the other caressing his balls. He broke their kiss and removed her hands, laughing at the pout that he found on her face.

"Darling, it's been too long, if you keep that up, I'm going to come in your hand," Killian admonished.

Emma smiled boldly, "Maybe another time then, but then, where's the fun in that." She pushed his boxers down, sinking to her knees as she worked the garment to the ground. She licked the underside of his cock before taking him down her throat. She leaned back to smile at him again but he pulled her up and tossed her on the bed, climbing on top of her and holding her down lightly with his weight. He pushed her thighs apart with his knees, running his hands on the inside of her thighs with the softest pressure he could just to tease her. He peppered her thighs with kisses skipping touching her core. He could smell her arousal, an intoxicating scent that magnified his desire to taste her.

Killian parted her folds, running two fingers through her sopping cunt to her clitoris, eliciting a series of delightful moans as he circled his fingers repeatedly over the swollen bundle of nerves. Emma met his eyes as he stopped, brought his fingers to his mouth, licking them clean and as soon as he had her arching up craving any touch, he leaned down and thrust his tongue into her. He fucked her over and over with his tongue, drawing out to lick and suck her clit. Focusing his mouth's attention back to her clitoris, he inserted two fingers into her, keeping her jade eyes locked with his the whole time. She started thrusting onto his fingers and he curled them just a bit more to reach her sweet spot. Her head rolled back on the bed breaking their gaze as she covered her mouth with her hand to muffle her orgasm.

"Killian, I need you in me," she panted, grabbing at his hair and pulling him up.

He complied, reaching for a condom from the side table, she stopped him. "I'm on birth control and let's not pretend we don't know each other's sexual history. I just want to feel you. No barriers."

Killian cursed at her admission and dropped the condom. He lined himself up to her entrance and sank into her in one thrust. He stilled to allow them each to adjust, he wasn't ready for it to be over before it began.

* * *

 

Emma's eyelids shuttered closed in a moment of ecstasy as her body stretched around him. Emma missed this. It had been too long. She needed him to move. She was right on the edge and desperately needed more.

"Killian, please…" coherent words failed her but he knew what she needed. He thrust slowly at first, his face buried in between her breasts. Gentle kisses to her breasts, collarbone and neck were almost too much. Killian pressed his lips just below her ear and she shifted her hips wider, allowing him to sink deeper with each thrust. Her second orgasm crept up on her from nowhere as he bottomed out hard within her.

"Emma, you feel so bloody amazing, love," Killian murmured, praising her, worshiping her with his body, his hands roaming freely, his mouth barely moving from her ear as he spoke.

"More," she croaked, unable to articulate further. Killian increased his pace and Emma wrapped her legs around his hips and thrust to match. Killian's right hand grabbed her ass, his left finding it's way to the right side of her neck keeping their bodies molded together. Emma was so fucking close. She could feel the pull in her lower body, she knew he felt it too. In their erratic thrusting and the wetness from her prior orgasms, he slipped from her and when he thrust back, he missed her entrance, instead hitting her pelvic bone then her clit. His primal growl as he sank back into her and drove deeper was the push she needed and her muscles began to clench around him, her orgasm an unstoppable wave that just kept crashing, dragging him under with her. Killian's grip on her neck shifted to the back of her head as he lifted her slightly, his mouth fully against her ear as he growled her name over and over until he stilled.

Emma felt bereft when he pulled from her and they lay side by side, panting as the euphoria faded slightly and she forced herself to get up to go to the bathroom. She retrieved her washcloth and ran it under the hottest water she could stand. Emma could feel the stickiness of their mixed releases seeping from her, rolling down her leg, and was grateful for a moment to pee and clean herself. Killian, obsessive compulsive disorder getting the better of him, walked into the bathroom still naked and gave her an annoyed look as he dramatically hung her towels back on the towel rack. Anyone else watching her washing up would've been awkward, but she had lived with him nearly eight years when she factored T.B.N. (time before Neal) and T.A.H. (time after Henry) and it felt nothing if not natural for him to see less than perfect moments. She could be herself with him in the perfect storybook moments or the nitty-gritty of post-sex personal hygiene. She had studied medicine and knew the different hazards of poor personal care, she shuddered and shoved thoughts of medical textbooks from her mind. Killian had hopped in the shower briefly and came up next to her at the sink, dripping wet, a towel wrapped at his waist, a shit-eating grin plastered on his face when he noticed Emma lick her lips at the sight.

They brushed their teeth side by side at the double sink vanity, smiling stupidly even as they each scrubbed their teeth. Killian replaced his towel and left the bathroom first so she swatted him playfully on his naked ass as he walked by, ignoring his exaggerated yelp of pain. When she finally crawled back into the bed once more, she instinctively wrapped herself against him, her back to his front. She felt amazing wrapped up in his arms. She'd forgotten just how powerful and amazing sex could be when you felt more than lust for a partner.

"Why the bloody hell did we wait so long to do that?" Killian whispered in her ear.

"We're idiots?" Emma postulated.

"I think we just forgot how good we were together. And maybe I was an idiot to let you get away before, but I was just trying to follow your lead and do what I thought you wanted," Killian turned her to face him.

"I promise, Killian, I'm here to stay. I don't want to be just friends anymore. I won't run like I did before," Emma promised. And she truly meant it. There was no haze on this memory, no pushing it to the recesses of her mind in order to preserve a friendship.

"I think I've just got to fuck you so many times this time you can't run, let alone walk away from me," Killian smirked, raising his eyebrows.

"I think the third time's the charm, though you won't hear a complaint from me if you want to do it again, and again, and again." Emma drew him in for a kiss, palming his already half hard length, licking her lips as she drew back from him. "But I've got to do something first."


	7. A New Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The morning after...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so very sorry it's been a while since I've updated. This has been a bad health year and it's been hard to write this the way I wanted so I just let it sit for a while. I've finally been able to get my muse to work with me to create this chapter (more coming soon). I've also decided that I'm going to do little previews of chapters in the future. So if you're interested, come find me on tumblr.
> 
> Also I know I said when I put the preview up earlier this week that I'd post on the 17th of September as it's my birthday and since it's still technically Sunday here in Pennsylvania, I've kept my word for once. My husband threw a surprise 30th birthday party for me and got me a Once Upon a Time cake. He told me it was supposed to be a swan and hook but the baker couldn't do it. If you want to see a picture, I posted one on my tumblr page.

A loud buzzing noise pounded in Killian’s skull as he slowly roused himself from sleep. Becoming more aware of his surroundings, he realized Emma was naked, her head on his chest, leg thrown overtop of his and Killian's hand rested just below her breast. His didn't know how to untangle himself without waking her. Emma never woke with the first alarm but he knew from experience that if he disturbed her, she would wake, albeit reluctantly. He reached backwards, at an odd angle, and smashed the snooze button on the alarm a few times, finally pleased with once it ceased, his desire for silence granted.

Killian turned back to Emma and just watched as her breasts rose and fell with each breath. He could feel his heart beating faster just surveying her beautiful form. He tucked a few fallen locks back behind her ear and sighed. She had told him she wouldn't run from him again but he was almost dreading the moment she would wake up. Killian had to wonder if this was a dream, if last night had been a dream, if the minute she opened her eyes, this would all end. He prayed to any god that would listen that it wouldn’t come to that.

He hadn't had many successful romantic relationships, so he knew despite being 100% in this relationship now, terror still lurked that something would fuck it all up. That _he'd_ fuck it all up. The more confident part of his mind assured him that they were a wonderful team and _she_ was his home. She and Henry were his family and he'd spend the rest of his life showing her how much he loved her. _The rest of his life?_ Things between had changed less than twelve hours ago, were still unofficial and here he was thinking about marriage? Yet, it felt right. It might not be the time for it, but that was his hope, that all of this would lead there someday in the not too distant future. He was an idiot who had wasted a good number of years not wanting to admit out loud that he was in love with his best friend and now he lay here with her in his arms after declaring their love out loud and making love to each other several times last night. It was all a matter of timing. Until now theirs had been spectacularly horrid and he had no intention of making the same mistakes again.

* * *

Killian was so immersed in his own thoughts, he didn't notice Emma's change in breathing, leaving the advantage to Emma. She grinned and slid her hand down to his gloriously hard cock. The hiss he made at her touch was all the encouragement she needed to slide her body down his. She met his eyes, pupils dark and unseeing as she took him in her mouth, and couldn’t help but be amused by how his head lulled backward toward the soft pillows. She swirled her tongue over his length before taking him deeper into her throat. She glanced at him as she did, his eyes closed and mouth open as various curses tumbled from his lips. Emma loved bringing him pleasure like this, hell, giving him a blow job turned her on.

Emma groaned when he twisted his fingers into her hair, tugging on her hair and gently holding her head as he fucked into her mouth. Emma swirled her tongue around him as she moved, knowing just how he’d react.

“Bloody hell, woman!” Killian moaned, pulling her off of him and tossing her onto her back, pinning her to the bed.

“Good morning to you too,” Emma grinned slyly. She was so content in this moment, more than she ever had been in her life. Killian dived his head forward and captured her nipple between his teeth, his hand drifting between her legs.

Feeling the dampness there, he smirked. “Definitely a good morning, love, but I think we can make it better,” he cajoled, slipping two fingers into her warm heat, curving them to stroke her sweet spot. Emma whimpered as he made her come in almost record time.

“Watching your face as I make you come will never get old for me,” Killian sighed against her breast.

“Good,” Emma acknowledged, nudging Killian onto his back. Emma leveraged her body above his and sank slowly down on his cock. “I think I’m going to take advantage of that as often as I can.”

Emma found her rhythm effortlessly, breasts bouncing in time with her movements. Killian's hands roamed her body, never truly losing touch with her. She loved how free she could be with him as she reveled in the heady power of being in control of their passion. With most of her previous lovers, Walsh and Neal notably came to mind, her pleasure was like an afterthought. With Killian, he always put her pleasure first, ensuring she came at least two or three times before he did. Emma never really thought that kind of thing was possible until him. Only Emma’s experimentations with a girl or two during college and her battery operated “me time” had given Emma anywhere near as much pleasure as Killian and, even then, it still wasn’t comparable.

Killian pulled her down to kiss her leisurely, thrusting out of sync with her. “Where were you just then, love? You were here riding me, your beauty bewitching me, leaving me entranced with you but your thoughts drifted somewhere else for a split second.”

Emma leaned on his chest, continuing to propel her hips downward, adjusting to the new angle. “I was just thinking about how perfect you are,” Emma admitted.

“Seriously? I wouldn’t have thought that judging by the look on your face. More like you were comparing me to past lovers,” Killian teased, groaning as Emma contracted her inner muscles harshly.

“Maybe, but you leave all of them in the dust. Always,” Emma promised as she shifted back to ride him again, her hand behind her on his thigh for stability.

“Don't worry, love, I know I have no reason to be jealous. You chose me and I’m just lucky as hell to have you,” Killian confessed, grabbing her breasts, one in each hand, kneading gently as she vocalized her enjoyment of his attentions. Knowing they were both so close, Emma guided his left hand to where they were joined and nodded. Killian rubbed eagerly as she increased her pace. Killian’s hand shifted to pinch her nipple perhaps a bit harsher than intended but Emma purred from the stimulation. Killian’s hips bucked up to meet hers, fucking her just as hard as she rode him.

“Come for me, darling,” Killian crooned, accent thicker with his desire. “Ride me, Emma, that’s it. Take what you need. What is always yours, my beautiful Swan,” Killian encouraged, thumb pressing harder on her clit.

The pressure on her clit, his hand pinching her nipple and his encouraging words were more than enough to push her over the edge. Killian cried out and Emma could feel him pulsing within her as they both came back down to Earth.

Emma pushed off of him, laying on the bed briefly, knowing she needed to clean up but not ready to move. “Can we do that again, Kil? I can’t get enough,” Emma pleaded.

“I will gladly oblige you, Em, but a man does need a moment or two to recover,” Killian jokingly whined.

“I’ve never known you to need very long in the past,” Emma whispered, mostly to herself.

“Bringing that up, are we?” Killian said cautiously, eying her for signs of walls going up. Every time they had discussed this particular topic, it hadn’t ended well. But then they always ended up with other people rather than each other.

“Not really my intention to discuss some of the worst decisions I’ve ever made so early in the morning, before I've even had a drop of coffee, but yeah. I always thought if I pretended to have never slept with you I could erase it from my mind and not let it ruin our friendship. It’s not like we were both in a good place each time it happened that I felt we could work without eventually losing each other. So I pretended and so did you. It was incredibly stupid of us but our life now isn’t one that I’d trade for anything,” Emma confessed.

“Our timing is finally perfect. We aren’t rebounding, experiencing grief or on a break from another partner, there is only us,” Killian smiled, positioning himself against Emma, to comply with her request for more.

“Henry,” Emma gasped.

“And Henry, of course,” Killian corrected.

“No, Killian,  _Henry!"_  Emma emphasized their son’s name as she pointed towards the door. Grabbing the blanket to cover themselves as they realized Henry had wandered into the room, followed closely by Elsa and Ruby, who stopped abruptly at the sight on the bed.

“Henry, sweetie, why don’t you give your mommy and daddy a few minutes to wake up,” Elsa winced noticing Emma and Killian barely covered by the blanket, trying to draw the little boy back into the hallway without dragging him.

“Oh, I’m sure they’re up, Elsa,” Ruby winked, before turning and kneeling done to her nephew’s level. “Henry, you know the rule if a door is closed, don’t you,” Ruby asked, smiling as Henry nodded silently, turning with a smirk clearly meant for her sister.

“We’ll see you downstairs soon,” Elsa mumbled, leaving the room with Henry in tow.

“Not too soon, mind you,” Ruby warned, amusement dancing in her eyes. “Maybe take a nice hot shower, it'll keep you from turning blue, if you catch my meaning,” with her suggestion made, Ruby pulled the door closed behind her as she exited the room.

“Oh my God, Killian. You had to comment on our timing,” Emma whined, smacking Killian’s arm as she rolled out of bed. “Thank God Elsa stopped Henry before he got much further. That was so embarrassing.”

“I'm sorry, love. I didn't mean to jinx anything. And we have nothing to be embarrassed about. We are consenting, responsible adults who love each other and have had sex before. And hopefully, we're about to again,” Killian smiled as he launched himself off bed and chased after her.

Emma squealed as he caught her around her waist and carried her into the large bathroom. He let her down just outside the shower before turning and making a big show of locking the bathroom door. Emma backed up into the shower and fumbled with the dial until she managed to spin it to the on position, watching through the glass of the shower enclosure as Killian stalked towards her. Killian was definitely ready to go again and Emma felt a thrill of excitement course straight to her lower half. Emma waited before the water reached a scalding temperature before stepping directly under the stream. Killian entered the shower and closed the door. Emma stood, running her hands over her breasts and body, keeping her gaze locked with Killian's, his eyes dark with lust as her hand drifted down to finger her sex.

“Emma…,” Killian warned as she continued to touch herself.

“If you have a problem, Kil, there are several ways to remedy it,” Emma advised, hands not stopping their tasks.

Killian surged forward and stopped her fingers, grabbing both her hands and holding them above her head, “Keep these here,” he commanded.

Killian sank to his knees, lifted her leg over his shoulder, ignoring the spray of the water gently pelting them and the discomfort of resting on the tile floor, he dipped his tongue to taste her. He lapped up their combined releases, sucking on her clit insistently, his hands massaging the firm globes of her ass. Emma groaned above him, savoring the contact, her hands slid down into his hair, holding him firmly in place, unable to resist writhing against his face as he sucked particularly hard on her clit.

“Killian, please, for the love of God, get up here,” Emma panted, overheating from more than the water temperature.

Killian shifted to his feet, setting Emma's leg on the ground she wouldn't slip. Once standing, he grabbed her under her ass, lifting her to line up with his cock. Emma nodded at him briefly and he thrust home, muffling her cry in his shoulder as he did. Killian maneuvered her to the wall without the shower controls, lifting her other leg so he was holding her suspended in air, back pressed flat to the shower wall.

Emma savored the sweet slide of Killian’s cock as he thrust slowly at first, gathering speed as he held her aloft. Emma could feel the water dousing them, creating a slippery contact between their bodies as they moved together. The thrill of being suspended above the floor by his strength, using her own to hold onto his body only added to her pleasure. Emma dug her heels into his ass, pulling him impossibly close.

The growl that rumbled up from Killian's throat sent Emma careening over the edge. Killian pistoned his hips a few seconds longer before he found release. Killian’s head fell against Emma’s shoulder and Emma groaned as her muscles started to protest their position.

“Right, sorry,” Killian mumbled as he moved away from her. Emma’s feet hit the ground and she stood fully under the water, grabbing the soap and washcloth to clean herself.

“The water is starting to get cold,” Killian complained, washing himself with speed.

“Well, we did let it run for a long while,” Emma laughed as she stepped out of the shower and toweled dry.

Killian pulled a towel off of the rack next to the shower stall, wrapping it around his waist as he leaned in to kiss Emma’s lips lightly. They dressed in peaceful silence. Emma brushed her hair and put on a light layer of makeup on as Killian put their clothes from last evening into the laundry bin and made the bed. Emma sat at the vanity seat for a few minutes as she watched Killian move with purpose around the room. Emma couldn’t help the butterflies in her stomach as she looked at him. He looked up, caught her eye in the mirror, a hunger in his beautiful blue eyes as he made his way across the room in a few brief strides. Emma stood but he caught her before she could stop him.

“Killian, if you keep looking at me like that, we are never going to leave this room,” Emma warned, pressing her hand firmly against his chest.

“You won’t hear much protest from me on that, darling,” Killian said lightly, kissing her neck.

“But Henry is awake and we need to go down to breakfast. I am famished,” Emma smiled, knowing he knew wouldn't argue.

“Are you ready then?” His hand fell to the doorknob and Emma nodded. “Ok, time to face them.”

Emma and Killian joined hands and made their way down the back stairwell to the kitchen. Dottie and Belle were leaning against the kitchen counter chatting with Mary Margaret and Regina who sat in chairs at the island breakfast bar. Elsa, Ruby, Will and David sat at the table managing the children as they ate their food. Robin, Liam and Ingrid relaxed with cups of coffee in the adjacent sitting area. Anna and Kris must have still been asleep.

“Looks like we aren’t the last ones awake,” Killian whispered in Emma’s hear, apparently a little louder than he intended.

“Oh, no, that’s where you’re wrong little brother. Anna and Kris were up early, took a pair of horses down to the beach to watch the dawn and have yet to return,” Liam chuckled, sending Killian a knowing look.

Ruby looked up from the children, giving a low wolf whistle, “Have a good night?” Smiles from everyone in the room clued them in that Ruby had been less than discreet with their news.

“Yeah, we did,” Killian smirked, looking down at Emma, shrugging his shoulders as if to say “why not just go with it?”.

David rose from his seat and walked over to the table where Will sat and slapped a twenty dollar bill down in front of him. David glared at Will, before turning to glare at the others around the counter. Dottie reached into her pocket and pulled out a fifty dollar bill and slide it to Regina. Ruby pulled out a small wad of bills from her top and flaunted it at everyone else.

“What is all that about?” Emma asked, partially hoping she was incorrect in her suspicions.

“Well, David bet will that you,” waving her hand in Killian's direction, “chickened out of telling Emma how you felt and has clearly lost. Dottie wagered that you guys would come down to breakfast separately to hide what you were up to last night. And I bet each and everyone of them, except Ingrid, at some point over the years, that you guys would end up together, that it was as inevitable as the sun rising in the east,” Ruby explained gleefully. She looked around at everyone as they nodded to confirm the truth of this statement.

Mary Margaret laughed and looked down to where Ruby still sat. “What about the money you owe me Rubes? You’ve refused for years to pay up.”

“There is no proof of that,” Ruby replied defensively, tucking the money back into her shirt, her smile daring Mary Margaret to come get it. Maybe she might have once, but Killian knew she'd do no such thing in front of the children.

“No proof of what?” Killian asked, curiosity at the unfolding scene unabated.

“Nothing,” Ruby and Mary Margaret said at the same moment.

“Ok, sure,” Killian conceded, feeling it was best not to chase the conversation further. “I love how nonchalant you all are about this discussion, especially with the kids in the room. It'd almost be disturbing if I didn't know you all so well.”

“Family, my darling, that's family for you,” was all Ingrid said, not even looking up from her coffee and iPad, continuing to read the news and calmly sip her drink.

Emma kept her tongue and gathered some fruit and waffles from the counter. She joined those at the table and ate quickly. Henry was engrossed in his own food and his cousins surrounding him to even take note that Killian and Emma entered the room. Killian tried not to be offended.

“Alright kiddos, who is ready to head down to the stables and see the horses?” Ingrid asked, setting aside her iPad and rising from her chair to deposit her used cup in the dishwasher.

“I'll come down with you, Ingrid,” Robin said. “Give you a hand with this lot,” waving his hand over the children’s heads, he left the comfort of his seat.

“Mum, are you sure you want to watch all the kids?” Killian asked, setting his fork down, breakfast momentarily abandoned.

“Yeah, you take some time to relax. Robin will help, and besides Gus and John are probably already down in the stables, so they will help if I ask. Plus, Brennan volunteered to help me with the younger children, didn't you Brennan?” she gathered her eldest grandchild to her as the children and their parents were shuffling by them, out of the kitchen to put on shoes and prepare for a day with the horses.

“Yes, Gramma,” the lad smiled, looping his arms around her and pressing himself into the older woman's side.

Ingrid hugged Brennan close and laid her hand on Killian's arm, “See there, all settled. Now if I'm not mistaken, you have a few other things to settle,” Ingrid said, nodding her head towards where Emma had knelt, just outside the kitchen door, in front of Henry, instructing him on expected behavior while at the stables. In a lower voice, “You two have been dancing around each other for too damn long. These last few years since Henry, you've settled into something resembling what I know you've both wanted but you need to talk. You need to actually communicate, to define what this thing is and what it means because it's not just you two anymore. You have that beautiful little boy of yours and you need to think about how this change will affect him. Because even in a good way, he will still be affected. And no matter what you are to each other, that little boy should always come first. Okay?”

Killian stared at his mother for a good long minute. He knew she was right, but that didn't mean it was an easy thing to admit. He and Emma needed to talk figure out where they stood and make sure, sex aside, that they were on the same page with the practicalities of a life together because as much as some things would be the same, many things were definitely going to change. At this point in their lives it wouldn’t work to ignore the proverbial elephant in the room again and be as stubborn as they had been over the years.

“Yes, mum. I promise Emma and I will talk,” Killian vowed. His mother gave him a stern look before nodding, seemingly satisfied with his response, she turned and walked towards the door.

Liam burst back through the door just before his mother could exit, still in the middle of a laugh. “Mum, all the kids have their shoes on and are waiting to head down to the stables. Belle is going to go with you, help manage the kids since she is not comfortable coming out on the yacht with the rest of us in her present condition. We won't be out all night but we likely won't be back by dinner. Mary Margaret and Regina put together a lasagna, garlic bread and apple pie for you all to eat tonight.”

“Thanks, Liam. Tell those girls I could've handled one dinner for my grandkids, but the thought is appreciated. I'll stay here in the big house after the kids go to sleep, at least until you get back. I'll send Robin and Belle in the car and you guys should get dinner somewhere nice. Maybe find a some good seafood for those who want it and something safe for all the pregnant ladies to select from,” Ingrid suggested, before turning to silently direct Brennan outside to put on his shoes.

“Thanks mum, but Elsa wanted to eat on the boat, so we have stuff that Robin already loaded into the galley. If Robin and Belle wish to join us, they will let us know. One of us will text them and figure it out later, though, I suspect they will prefer to stay here. Are you sure you're going to be okay?”

Killian watched as Ingrid's smiled blossomed. “I raised four kids, I have some idea how to handle difficult children,” she laughed, eyeing them both strongly before taking her leave.

Laughter burst forth from both brothers as the screen door slammed shut behind their mother.

“I'm surprised she didn't make a quip about our children being worse versions of ourselves,” Liam breathed, laughter subsiding.

“If I see familiarity in Henry, it's all Emma,” Killian admitted, looking around subtly to see if anyone else was still in the house.

“Be that as it may, he takes after you in many ways. Family isn't just genetics, we know that better than most. Family is complicated and messy, kids even more so, but it's worth, I think. Though I'll admit, brother, I'm a little terrified at the thought of another child. Soon Elsa and I will be outnumbered,” Liam confessed, letting the weight of his confession fall away with the words.

“Father once told me, long before Henry was born, that fear is something you'll always feel once you become a parent. It never goes away, no matter how much you will it to. However with parenthood also comes a love as deep and unending as the seas. He stressed that even when you can't see it, you know it's there. It was his way of apologizing for all that had lain between us my whole life. No one is perfect, Li. You can only do your best and hope that it's enough. Hope that they love you despite your mistakes and that they turn out alright.”

“So wise all of a sudden, little brother?” Liam clapped him on the shoulder, amusement etched on the older man's face. “Although how, if you're so wise, did it take you this long to get your head out of your arse about Emma, huh?”

“Younger brother,” Killian corrected out of habit. “I'm not entirely sure that I'm all that wise. Parenting isn't easy and a million times a day I question myself. Bloody hell, I've been in a holding pattern of inaction with Emma for so long, l am terrified I'm going to botch it up now that we might actually get somewhere. That I’ll end up hurting her and Henry. The one thing I'm confident I won't mess up is work. It's funny how much I always thought I'd hate it, only really did it to get Dad off my back, but it I love practising the law. At least he never said ‘I told you so’ about that.”

Killian dropped his forehead into the palms of his hands, running them back through his hair as though to push away thoughts of his father. Thoughts that were bringing up a plethora of memories and he didn't want those to mar the day before it truly began, a day that held great promise thus far.

Liam’s expression changed quickly to a grimace as if something had suddenly struck him. “Killian, don’t worry, I know there’s no way you could ever intentionally hurt either of them. You’re a good man and a great father,” Liam paused and Killian had to wonder what was weighing on his brother’s mind. “Look, I know now might not be an ideal time, what with things between you and Emma about to be sorted, but I need you to do a rather large favor for me.” Liam wasn't often one to ask a favor, typically he was the one granting favors so Killian nodded for his brother to voice his concern.

“Tuesday I was supposed to fly to London, spend a couple days at the office there before heading home,” Liam explained.

“Aye, for the move to the new offices, right?” It had been something that had been in the works for a number of years. The office in London had started out in of a poorly designed old townhouse more than thirty years ago with maybe a half dozen lawyers at first but their father, then Liam, had built it up to over seventy lawyers and staff of varying specialties of law. The new offices were located in a commercial building, built specifically for office use, the three floors of the building they had leased providing a better work environment and room to grow.

“Yes, but I was hoping you'd go in my place. Elsa has a sonogram appointment on Wednesday and I've never missed an appointment when she's been pregnant, so I'd really hate to start now.”

A part of him wanted to say no but he really couldn't. He had a responsibility to ensure their business was successful and having a managing partner there for the transition would be beneficial. As a brother and a parent, he also understood Liam’s desire to be there for every appointment to support Elsa and share in the excitement of the new life they would soon welcome to their family. Killian had only missed one appointment for Emma when she had been pregnant with Henry, though nothing important happened at that appointment, he still berated himself for weeks (months) afterwards.

“Of course, Li, I’ll go to London. I wouldn't make you miss Elsa’s appointment,” Killian assured his older brother.

“Thank you. Truly, Killian, I appreciate it. Now why don’t we check on everyone and see of they are still up for sailing. It’ll be a bit brisk today and the ocean’s definitely too cold for swimming. Not that it would stop you, Will and Emma from trying once upon a time. I thought you lot were seriously cracked; swimming in water barely above freezing. I’m amazed that none of you got hypothermia,” Liam’s exasperation at the memory clear.

“I was nineteen years old and I did a lot of stupid stuff then,” Killian defended, ignoring his brother mumbling bit something that sound like ‘Then?’. Killian rolled his eyes. “I’m just glad that Belle was able to pilot the boat back in that day or we might have been stranded.”

“You’re going to be stranded if you don’t get a move on it. I’m going to commandeer your vessel,” Emma teased loudly so those outside could hear her, snickering at her bold claim. Killian hadn’t even noticed her slip back into the house, she had been so quiet.

“You’ve gone and turned pirate on me?” Killian cocked his head at her, standing arms crossed in front of him. “Bad form, love.”

“Well if you agree to my demands, I think we can avoid any hostilities,” Emma beamed. “Now get a move on it!”

“Aye, captain,” Killian responded, stopping to wait for her just as he neared the bottom of the stairs. Emma slapped him playfully and he moved swiftly to avoid another smacking, taking the steps two at a time, a chipper Emma following close behind.

Back in their room, Emma rooted a smaller bag out of her suitcase, throwing a few essentials, including swimwear, in case their reckless side kicked in, and sweaters for the practicality of being on the open ocean in early April. Killian tucked his items into her bag and escorted her down to the patio where everyone else was waiting. Just as they were about to depart, Anna and Kris showed up from the direction of the stables, Anna asking to accompany them, eliciting several groans from those all ready to depart. Kris on the other hand begged off in order to join the others back in the stables. For a man that could pilot a plane in the roughest of weather, Kris wasn't very fond of water or boats. Anna bid Kris adieu and then set off to her room to grab things she needed for the day. Killian laughed as the others just took a seat, knowing that punctuality wasn’t one of his sister’s specialities and it was going to be some time before they would be underway.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It will be at least two weeks until I can get the next chapter done. I've got to work 11 days straight because of overtime at work so I'm going to be too exhausted to make the corrections Chapter 8 needs.

**Author's Note:**

> This story was nominated on Tumblr for the Captain Swan Fanfic Awards in the following categories:
> 
> Best Alternate Universe (Modern Setting) WIP
> 
> Best Plot WIP 
> 
> Best WIP -50k
> 
> I am beyond humbled to be considered in these categories along with so many other talented folks. I'm Katealexandra26 on Tumblr if you want to find me over there.


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